Hi
gwestbrook2 I join Faith in welcoming you to bpdfamily, we are glad you are here
It is understandable that you'd be fearful of a visit going south after such a long period of no-contact.
now she wants to come so we can all "work out" and "get over"(her words) our uncomfortable feelings with each other.
I'm seeing this as a positive, she wants to work toward being comfortable around you and wants you to be comfortable with her around. It's a step in the right direction.
Has the visit been scheduled already or are you all still in the planning stages?
You talk about using your tools, can you tell us more about what has worked for you in the past? We've lots of communication tools that we are all learning together and it's always great to hear how what's worked for others in similar situations.
I look forward to hearing more from you, venting and all, and how we can best support you.
~ OH