Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
April 20, 2025, 04:29:14 AM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Experts share their discoveries
[video]
100
Caretaking - What is it all about?
Margalis Fjelstad, PhD
Blame - why we do it?
Brené Brown, PhD
Family dynamics matter.
Alan Fruzzetti, PhD
A perspective on BPD
Ivan Spielberg, PhD
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
Needing support to leave.
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Needing support to leave. (Read 533 times)
StandingUpFirm
Fewer than 3 Posts
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 1
Needing support to leave.
«
on:
July 31, 2019, 10:20:15 AM »
My therapist provided guidance that my romantic partner shows traits of BPD. I bought some books on the topic and the lightbulb suddenly went off, this is just like my life is so many ways. While I thought about trying to advise my romantic partner to seek help, I feel like it's going to be another lose-lose scenario so I've decided to leave. Can anyone share their experiences of leaving a BDP relationship that includes children, so I have some ideas of what I'll be up against?
Logged
RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.
Cat Familiar
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 7502
Re: Needing support to leave.
«
Reply #1 on:
July 31, 2019, 04:05:08 PM »
If you’re looking for others’ stories of ending a marriage, check out the Family Law board.
I know that you are planning to leave, but I’m going to relocate your thread to the Bettering board. There you will learn strategies that will help you communicate better with your spouse, as you will have a lot of arrangements to negotiate in the future.
Logged
“The Four Agreements 1. Be impeccable with your word. 2. Don’t take anything personally. 3. Don’t make assumptions. 4. Always do your best. ” ― Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom
Scarlet Phoenix
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Together 9 years
Posts: 1155
Re: Needing support to leave.
«
Reply #2 on:
July 31, 2019, 04:13:20 PM »
Hi StandingUpFirm,
I hear you. You want out.
Many people here have left a relationship where children were involved. As Cat Familiar says, there's the Legal Board when you get to that point.
Meanwhile, I hope you'll find the support you want here on Bettering. We understand your focus is leaving. As long as you're under the same roof and for the years to come with co-parenting, learning the skills and tools we discuss here on Bettering will be really useful to you. They can help you lower tensions in the household and communicate about the children.
We're here for you
Warmly
Scarlet
Logged
~~ The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; who strives valiantly; who errs; who comes short again and again ... and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly ~~
Become who you are
~~
AskingWhy
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 1025
Re: Needing support to leave.
«
Reply #3 on:
July 31, 2019, 10:03:44 PM »
If you choose to leave, it's important to know that pwBPD can become enraged and project their lack of control onto you.
If you are married or in a domestic partnership, please read Bill Eddy's, "Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder."
Breaking up with a pwBPD is not a normal experience. You can expect the love/hate aspect to rear its head.
Be strong in whatever you do.
https://www.amazon.com/Splitting-Protecting-Borderline-Narcissistic-Personality/dp/1608820254
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
Needing support to leave.
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...