Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
October 14, 2019, 11:17:58 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Harri, Once Removed, Scarlet Phoenix
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, FaithHopeLove, I Am Redeemed, Mutt, Only Human, Turkish
Ambassadors: Enabler, formflier, GaGrl, Longterm, Ozzie101, Swimmy55, zachira
  Help!   Groups   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Skills we were never taught
98
A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
Don't Be Invalidating
Listen with Empathy -
A Powerful Life Skill
Setting Boundaries
and Setting Limits
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Just when we thought we were doing ok...  (Read 201 times)
MomSA
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Person in your life: Child
Posts: 155



« on: September 10, 2019, 12:16:50 AM »

5 weeks ago we were so excited to see our daughter launch into what we had hoped would be a new phase of her life. We were cautiously optimistic believing that after 3 months of rehab, 12 weeks of DBT and ongoing therapy with a team around her she would make good choices.

We found out on Saturday that she is using drugs heavily again, driving under the influence and hooking up with strangers she's meeting via instagram who are musicians.

We are meeting tomorrow with her therapist and psychologist to discuss options for intervention.

I leave with my youngest son on Monday for 3 weeks, this has come at an awful time.
Logged
Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
FaithHopeLove
Senior Ambassador
*
Online Online

Person in your life: Child
Posts: 1203



« Reply #1 on: September 10, 2019, 01:47:20 AM »

That is so sad. I hope your meeting with the therapist will help.
 
 
Logged

Hugs,
Faith
PeaceMom
****
Offline Offline

Person in your life: Child
Posts: 342


« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2019, 10:55:34 PM »

MomSA,
I’m so sorry you learned of DD’s current dangerous behavior. What are you hoping to learn from your meeting? It is so hard when we see a glimpse of healthy behavior only to learn that BPD symptoms were still overpowering. It must be like a constant tug-o-war inside them as most know at their core, right from wrong, but the impulsivity takes over.
Logged
wendydarling
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Person in your life: Child
Posts: 2518



« Reply #3 on: September 11, 2019, 05:53:01 AM »

MomSA I too am sad to hear this and glad you've the appointment with her medics.

WDx
Logged

MomSA
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Person in your life: Child
Posts: 155



« Reply #4 on: September 11, 2019, 06:46:55 AM »

MomSA,
I’m so sorry you learned of DD’s current dangerous behavior. What are you hoping to learn from your meeting?

Thank you Faith, Wendy and Peace for responding.

Our first prize would be that she admits the truth that she cannot use drugs to cover her pain. That she would choose to voluntarily go back to rehab or even into some for of accountability program. This way she gets to keep on with her job and independent living.

We are doubtful that this will happen.

When she moved out we gave her a car to use. She knows, due to a contract she signed, that if she drove under the influence of any substance we would take the car away. We hope to use this as a "bargaining" chip to get her to commit to one of the above. Freedom of movement is huge for her.

If she says we can take the car back as she wants to continue living as she is, we will start proceedings to get her back into rehab for a much longer time.

Our meeting is at 5:30.

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.
Logged
Huat
****
Offline Offline

Person in your life: Child
Posts: 449


« Reply #5 on: September 11, 2019, 01:05:42 PM »

His MomSA

I've been reading your posts and time I jumped in here, too, to give you a  Virtual hug (click to insert in post) and some support.

So many ups and downs with these children of ours.  You certainly are earning your "Super Mom" badge.....and never harbour any doubts as to whether or not you deserve it.  You do!  Sadly, some of us are having to work harder than others.

Huat
Logged
MomSA
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Person in your life: Child
Posts: 155



« Reply #6 on: September 12, 2019, 09:17:34 AM »

Thank you Huat Smiling (click to insert in post)

Feedback is that she took the option to keep the car and go for drug testing at a clinic twice a week until her 21st birthday in 4 months time. This is going to be very hard for her unless she changes her friend group.

I feel so sad for this child.

Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2019?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2020 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
AskingWhy
Bittlecat
Harri
Only Human
PeacefulMom
Radcliff
Skip
Teno
Ventak
wendydarling
Wicker Man
worn_out





Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2019, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!