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Author Topic: ex pwBPD has given me a career, a dissertation, and a passion to help others  (Read 404 times)
Will2Power

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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up
Posts: 31



« on: December 11, 2019, 08:41:35 AM »

I wrote my research proposal for my PhD program yesterday. (Phd is in counselor education and supervision, already have my masters in clinical mental health counseling, and now I am a licensed professional counselor.)  Out of BPD relationship almost two years, (no contact two years on 2/11/20).
 
Upon searching and reading many academic journal articles, sadly, there is little to no published academic research that demonstrates the damage a borderline does to a non-diagnosed partner.

So I’m doing it myself, as a pioneer in my field. We all know informally that there are definitely effects in the aftermath of a relationship, but formal research shy’s away from this topic. The study is qualitative and aims to grasp the lived experiences of those who have had intimate relationships with a pwBPD, as well as how being with the pwBPD impacts their future romantic relationships.

CAN YOU BELIEVE THERE IS NOT ONE ACADEMIC PUBLICATION ABOUT THIS?

I want to show y’all the whole paper, but it’s over 40 pages long. Eventually, I hope that the IRB grants me some funding and I can actually do this research for my big dissertation at the end of the program, which is in about 2 years.

I am feeling stronger than ever that my traumatic experience has made me able to operate under the guise that “knowledge is power”, and I have made my past into something that can help others, and push me to succeed in the competitive world of being a published doc in academia, and counseling.

I hope eventually, I can recruit some of you all to (anonymously) be part of my research that I hope can change the world.

Additionally, I want to publish as much as possible post- doctorate so that I can shed a light on C-PTSD (not in the DSM-5), and everything that we’ve experienced due to our expwBPD.

I hope I am allowed to post about this here/I am in the right board. If anyone is feeling invalidated  about  their experiences, or like the rest of the world doesn’t understand, maybe I can make it less by publishing about the topics we talk about and need help with daily. Help is on the way! I know it’s only a bit of help, but I am proud of have the power to do this once I graduate with my PhD.

We are stronger and better because of our experiences, and I want to give back to the community eventually, as well as highlight to all mental health professionals better ways to treat and help a person coming out of a relationship with someone with BPD. The prevalence rate is high, but many therapists do not understand the concepts of mind fog, manipulation, and gaslighting and the effects it has. I am just so glad I get to attempt to make this impact
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WileyCoyote
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 127



« Reply #1 on: December 11, 2019, 09:35:44 AM »

Send Skip a PM and maybe he would be willing to put in the resources section.  I for one would love to check it out.  I am actually going down the same path but have not completed my masters yet.
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Everything you want is on the other side of fear.
Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.
I'm going to get that damn road runner.

"A self of suffering, brings only suffering to the world.
It is a choice, and we can refuse it."  Ashkaari Canto 4
clvrnn
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken Up
Posts: 501



« Reply #2 on: December 11, 2019, 09:38:24 AM »

Wow! This is amazing.

I am on a degree which contains a lot of mental health-related content, and I have found that meeting my ex pwBPD at university has given me first-hand experience of the traits of the disorder. My last essay was a case study of a person with BPD, and the causes from childhood, and how it affects relationships. If I had not had that experience, I doubt I'd have been able to really understand it in the way I have. So I really admire what you've done and achieved, and totally understand where you're coming from, and would love to read any of your work - would I be able to see your research proposal? I'm in the middle of a dissertation myself, so academic papers are all I read, lmao (don't worry, wouldn't steal any of it - I'm doing a dissertation on a total different topic)

Well done!
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otherlife

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 27


« Reply #3 on: December 12, 2019, 03:10:28 PM »

Congratulations Will2power for all you hard work, tenacity and dedication, there is certainly a need.  I would be happy to participate as awareness needs to be brought to the forefront so that education can be used to both support and prevent (if possible) anyone being in this situation.   As family, ex partners, parents or friends we suffer because we love, care and often carry the guilt.  Its dammed if you do and dammed if you don,t.  there are no winners in this just casualties on all sides so the more we can do to help the better.   I hope you get your grant funding but if you dont then perhaps we could donate ( not sure if this is correct posting that here but sure administrators will guide on this.  I would also love to see your paper if at all possible please.   Good luck and please include me.
Oh talking about donations I have not yet done mine for this year for this site ...sorry I will do it tonight. 
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