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Author Topic: Emotional abuse from my BPD twin  (Read 811 times)
1stTwin

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Relationship status: estranged
Posts: 7


« on: July 02, 2020, 10:33:33 AM »

It has been a long time since I’ve posted! My twin sister is an alcoholic and has Ben diagnosed with BPD at least several years ago. Her alcoholism is out of control . She is abusive to me and lives in the same town as me, of which we moved her here 2 years a ago as she was divorcing and had been sober for 9 months. She has made my life a living hell over these last 2 years! We have been not speaking to each other off and on for the last 2 years! Every time I go to the grocery store or in public I’m concerned I’ll run into her! I am soo tired of her treatment of me and she has turned her children against me, which is very painful! I had her blocked on my iPhone and thru my cell phone company and unblocked her recently and yesterday she sent me a text that was so unkind and mean! My husband and I have helped her many times over the 42 years we have been together, but we are thru! I don’t want contact with her or to see her ever again! She has treated me unkindly all of my life and I just can’t do it anymore with her! She has abused the food stamp system here and I’m going to turn her in! In the last message I left on her voicemail, I told her to please move out of the town we both live in, but she refuses to because she is on food stamps here and lives in federally funded housing! She has it good here she says! My life has been a living hell since she has been here! I am so tired of all her behavior! Our Dad died 7 yrs ago because of alcohol, our brother died 4 years ago because of alcohol, and she is on that same path! Please pray that I can find a way to enjoy my life here with my husband and children and grandchildren who live near by, but to let my sister go and go on with my life! I have so many blessings to be thankful for, and my sister and her treatment of me is bringing me down! I changed my phone number 6 months ago and then we reconciled and now I’m thinking of changing it again! I would love to hear from others who are going thru sililar things and especially if there are any twins out there who have a BPD sister who is also an alcoholic.
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Harri
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 5981



« Reply #1 on: July 04, 2020, 06:36:26 PM »

Hello!

What happened that you unblocked her on your phone?

Excerpt
She has abused the food stamp system here and I’m going to turn her in!
How is she abusing the system and how did you learn of it?

Excerpt
Please pray that I can find a way to enjoy my life here with my husband and children and grandchildren who live near by, but to let my sister go and go on with my life!
What sort of things have you tried to heal yourself and get stronger when it comes to coping?  Have you gone to therapy?  Had a chance to read any of the articles we have tacked to the top of the board?

Sorry for all the questions.  Smiling (click to insert in post)  I am trying to figure out how to help you and what you want to focus on first.

Post more when you can.   Virtual hug (click to insert in post)
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  "What is to give light must endure burning." ~Viktor Frankl
1stTwin

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Relationship status: estranged
Posts: 7


« Reply #2 on: July 06, 2020, 10:25:44 AM »

Harri, I unblocked my phone to my sister as I had a weak moment and was missing her! Boy, what a weak moment! Nothing like emotional abuse to block her again! As far as her abusing the food stamp program, I believe she has not been truthful about funds she has had in the bank with regards to the sale of her former home. As far as what I’ve been doing to help myself concerning the abuse from her, I am seeing a counselor and have been for the last year and a half.
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1stTwin

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Relationship status: estranged
Posts: 7


« Reply #3 on: July 06, 2020, 10:32:32 AM »

Harri, I have also decided not to turn her in for food stamp fraud. The emotional toll that may take on me is too great as she would know who did it and retaliate on me for it. I’ve decided it’s not worth it! I have to let go and let God handle it!  I have read some of the articles that are posted on this website. I am helped most by those who are going thru similar things as me.
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formflier
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 19076



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« Reply #4 on: July 10, 2020, 05:47:46 AM »

  I have read some of the articles that are posted on this website. 

Which articles resonated with you?  Which articles seemed hard to grasp?

What does the term "boundaries" mean to you?

Best,

FF
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