BPD me, him ,both?

[Shewack]

Hi all thank u so much for letting me in your group. I hope i found the right place. I've struggled most of my life with relationships. I started looking up walking on egg shells because my spouse is always so angrey and blames me but after hearing so much about it I'm starting to think that I have BPD too. He is very good at convincing that I don't know and can't handle anything. But I also have a weak sense of self and allow him to drag me down which put me in depression. I also feel like his teenage kids have turned on me. And now my son's are showing signs. I feel so sad and lonely but want to get better so I can at least set a good example to my son's. Where do I start?

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Mutt]

Hi  Shewack,

But I also have a weak sense of self and allow him to drag me down which put me in depression.

A lot of pwBPD have strong internal maladaptive coping mechanisms that would deny to them the fact that they are a pwBPD. I don't want to generalize and say that all pwBPD likely don't know that they are ( some do and get help for it ) but the fact they you are questioning this is an indicator that you are likely not a pwBPD. I completely understand how your navigation system gets scrambled when you feel like you're losing your sense of self, a lot of pwBPD are anxious and can sort of set that tone and make everyone in the house feel anxious because of how they deal ( or don't deal with ) with their emotions.

It helps to talk to others that can relate with your experiences and that can be your sounding board and help you when things are confusing.

I think that anywhere is a good start because a lot of members including myself have been dealing with a lot of really confusing situations and have been in the dark for a long time and have a lot of stories that they can't share with anyone else.

I'm glad that you decided to join us there is hope.