I have known my bpd ex boyfriend (undiagnosed) for many years. Started off as friends. 2 years ago that changed and we became more then friends and “fell in love” or so I thought. In the beginning things were great. One day he decided he wanted to go back to his ex and left. I hadn’t heard from him for 2 months. After 2 months I needed to contact him for a work situation and fell right back into the relationship. One year later I got mad at him and called him a name (over the phone) that he didn’t like and he sent me all these weird texts I didn’t understand and then blocked me. No contact, blocked me from being able to call or text him and all social media. A week later he called telling me he wanted to be friends... a day later I fell back into the relationship. He always seemed to have two sides, overly loving and amazing or cold. I never knew why. If I asked him if he was ok he would get mad and tell me I was “analyzing him” and then would act even colder and more distant until he would snap out of it as I would call it. This last time just happened a few days ago. He asked me to go away with him as he had to be away for work so I Flew to where he was. We were supposed to have a 3 week amazing time. The first 10 days were fantastic (except for one minor disagreement, as all normal couples have)
A few days later we had what I would consider another small argument and again, being mad I called him a name he didn’t like and he told me to leave but I didn’t (I was in a city alone, knew no one, was a 14 hour car ride or 3 hour flight away from home and my trip was booked for another 1+week) so he left for the night. The next morning he came back and told me we were finished and if I didn’t leave (the hotel) he would. I apologized immensely and explained what upset me and told him how sorry I was (although again, I didn’t think this was anything more then a normal couple having a minor argument) and I told him I thought he was an amazing person and the name I called him was just out of anger and I didn’t mean it whatsoever. He said we were done and and to leave. I had to change flights, take ubers and get home that day. I was devastated. When I got home I sent him a text telling him how much I love him and understood why he got upset but to ask me to leave the way He did was wrong. He texted me back 2 days later and told me “we are done, have no relationship, but that he won’t block me from his life like he has in the past and if I want I could text him” ...well, that just confused me more!. I’m at a loss. As I write this I feel like I am talking about a pathetic stranger and not myself but I can’t lie, I’m heartbroken.