I have been in a relationship for 3.5 yrs with someone with BPD. It has been both the best and the worst relationship of my life. He either hates me or loves me intensely with no in between.
I have to get out of this relationship. I am so codependent of him and have no one to talk to. No one understands. They think it’s easy to just end it.
I need words of advice. I need encouragement. I need to get some self esteem back.
Hi there, and welcome to our community.
Can you say a little bit more about the kind of advice you are looking for?
One thing I'd say is that self-esteem isn't a thing in of itself so much as a result of good boundaries and a self-identity that is "you" apart from anyone else. No - these relationships are seldom if ever easy to end. You use the word "co-dependent" - are you in therapy, or is that just a way of describing how you are enmeshed with him?
Talk your way through this will be one way to unhook. It sounds like you are feeling a little isolated and a little backed into a corner.
Reach out again.
Hang in there.
Rev
