How To Be My Own Priority?

[Mr. Irrelevant]

Crying this morning I am glad she knows she needs help so do I it has been a long and lonely road this is my first post I am very relieved to have found this site.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Hope 2021]

Buddy, you are not alone.  Admitting that she has a disorder and accepting it is a step in the right direction.    The BDP family website has a lot of critical information that you can use to minimize the challenges that you will probably face in order to help you wife.   She needs help, but the way to help her is not the typical "Spouse assistance" that you may think.   there are a lot of things that you cannot do solely because persons who suffer from this disorder, do not react the same as a normal person.  And the results could easily complicate things for her recovery.   I am not an expert, but my soon to be ex-wife after 21 years, still denies that she has a problem.  Even if I can show her and prove it to her.   They don't see the same thing as you do.  It is an agony that if you don't learn from it and change your strategy, It will get harder and harder.   There are some great posts on this website that will help you find your way of facing these challenges in a more optimist view.   Just my two cents.   Stay strong.   Easier said than done but you have to!

[wendydarling]

Hello Mr Irrelevant and welcome

As Hope2021 says you've come to the right place for support and understanding, you are not alone.    My daughter hit crisis in 2015, was diagnosed and is now in recovery following DBT and therapy.

I hear your relief, 15 years is a long time and it's been a lonely road. Has your wife worked out herself she's suffering BPD? Did something happen to prompt her admission?

So glad you found us and look forward to hearing more from you, welcome again.

WDx

[Mr. Irrelevant]

Just feeling overwhelmed each and every time I interact with my wife; by the time I deal with the emotional crisis of the moment, I have nothing left inside of me to resolve my own issues...this is why I chose my screen name it's my own personal nickname for myself because any help in finding a way back to the guy who used to have his own dreams and goals in life but is too burned out to care about himself any more would be greatly appreciated.