Splitting episode & breakup

[Birdmam]

Hello,
This is my first post. After a 26yr long marriage to a wife who has a verifiable diagnosis of cptsd and also shows signs of crossover BPD, I am apprx 8 weeks out from her having a splitting episode and leaving.
After several sessions with our old therapist, a lot of reading, studying,etc.
I look back now and can see some of the classic red flags & triggers.
Thought things were turning around a bit after her reaching out via text but seems she was only fishing for info regarding business leading to a request for her stuff.

I agreed to send rather than have her pickup as before she left she'd stolen money and tried to leave a vicious rumor regarding my behavior at my business.
I stated I'd be happy to send her stuff cause I certainly didn't want to be with anyone who wasn't sure they wanted to be with me.

The response was a repeat of everything she'd said the day she left.
My inability to show her I loved her, hold her, etc along with the accusations regarding my questionalbe behavior.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Cat Familiar]

I’m very sorry you are dealing with these difficulties after such a long marriage. Do you hope to repair things or are you feeling like this is an ending?