Possible BPD Woman Causing Confusion

[michaelcover]

My friends bought this bar and hired this girl named Talia. She has always paid close attention to me and was saying she has a boyfriend in front of me then she told me they broke up. She did say things like "come in on wednesday thats the only day i dont work" (at the same time she would increase her hours and announce her hours in front of me). Once some co-workers came up to her and asked her "do you like Michael?" and she said "no, im taken. me and my ex were dating for 10 years plus but i want a man who can tame me." the next day she was yelling at me and said unprovoked "why do you think im crazy? you dont know me to think im crazy. no woman wants you." then she began to engage me and she appeared a bit nervous around me and was preening her clothes and biting her lip and fidgety and paid close attention to me saying, "oh my god you looked at me 7 times tonight. why did you look at me 7 times?" she also said things like "i pay attention to people i like and im not paying attention to you" and she says things "you need to change ur music taste. i cannot tolerate the fact that you find music with white supremacist lyrics funny". she then said "oh im gonna go on a date with my ex bf tomorrow at 5pm" and showed me a poster of her then she began bringing this "ex boyfriend" around me at company events and the bar/restaurant try to get me to talk to him. he didnt seem to know who i was but was friendly (hes a gym guy goes to the gym all day not a muscle builder though). talia and him interacted in a highly friendly manner but i saw no intimacy (touching, kissing, lap sitting, etc). one time her ex walked into the bar, saw us talk briefly, but didnt say anything. last time her ex came i told her "im leaving" and she said "oh this is the 5th time you said you are leaving and you havent left yet". i have strong doubts that she dated that guys for 10 years because my friend told me he went on a date with Talia like 8 months ago. she has a bunch of random tattoos that she cant clearly explain why she got. i cant tell if she likes me, dislikes me, or pretends to dislike me. should i come out to the bar tonight?

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Notwendy]

If you like playing with fire, sure.

Or you can wait it out because if she's acting inappropriately with you, she's likely also acting that way with other customers and being inconsistent with her job duties. I assume your friends bought the bar as a legitimate business and if it begins to hurt their business, this person won't remain employed there.

[michaelcover]

If you like playing with fire, sure.

Or you can wait it out because if she's acting inappropriately with you, she's likely also acting that way with other customers and being inconsistent with her job duties. I assume your friends bought the bar as a legitimate business and if it begins to hurt their business, this person won't remain employed there.

Notwendy, can you please explain the games and what kind of risks this will likely lead to if I pursue it with her?

[Notwendy]

That would be far too long a post. I think it would help if you read the posts on the conflicted board here. The beginning of a BPD relationship may not be representative of the whole of it. I think the posters on this board have been in them for a while and their experiences would be informative about the possible risks.