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Author Topic: I couldn’t think of a subject today.  (Read 459 times)
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 69


INFP


« on: November 07, 2022, 06:32:31 PM »

 Welcome new member (click to insert in post)
Long time, no see! I have been gone from the board for so long, but never forgot how safe I feel here. I want to share a couple things that have been on my mind lately.

I’ve recently learned that PTSD/CPTSD are often misdiagnosed as BPD at first. And am thinking (but will never know) my uBPD mom is really uPTSD/uCPTSD. She has a horrifying childhood sexual abuse history. I suppose a lot of the symptoms/behaviors, and impact on those around her, would be similar with any of these diagnoses? Thoughts?

Since my last post here, I have been diagnosed with OCD (“pure O”) focused on heath and  romantic relationships. I was misdiagnosed with GAD for many years. But since I’ve been reading about CPTSD, the symptoms really resonate. Her abuse was (and still is) mostly emotional, and she also exaggerated my health conditions/Illnesses. As a result, I was over-doctored and everything that went on with my health was under a microscope.

In my life right now, I’m “happily” married (any marriage is hard work), comfortable, and have hobbies/friends. But everyday I struggle with intrusive thoughts about my health and the health of my wife. It is a miserable feeling. And what’s worse is my brain still believes that there is something that I can do to “save” my wife from getting a horrible disease or making the diseases she already has, worse. Every day I struggle to hold myself back from quizzing her about her health and how I think she could better manage it. I’m LC with my Mom because I get triggered so much every time I speak with her. I wish I could be NC but I’m an only and her husband is mentally incapable of helping her.

Thank you for reading.  Virtual hug (click to insert in post)

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Turkish
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12183


Dad to my wolf pack


« Reply #1 on: November 07, 2022, 09:01:33 PM »

My mother has a horrible sexual child abuse history made worse as after her mom died young when my mom was 12 and her older siblings moved out, she was left alone with their father. It stopped at 14 when he croaked and she was orphaned. He already had moved prostitutes in from time to time as well.

I knew that she'd been doing intense therapy since 1989 when I graduated high school and moved out. About 6 years ago, she shared with me that one of her therapists gave her a book on BPD to suggest that her father had it, yet my mom took it to also mean that she was being given a roundabout Dx of BPD herself. My mom accepted that she was a pwBPD.

What blew my away more was that she also admitted that when I was little (late 70s, early 80s?) That she was in therapy for PTSD due to her childhood.

This might shed some light for you (click on the quote link for the whole discussion)

Clinicians often use PTSD (which has a reimbursement code) to describe C-PTSD, a disorder first proposed by Judith Herman, MD, a professor of clinical psychology at Harvard University, but one that has yet to be recognized as an official diagnosis. Patients with C-PTSD are often classified as  PTSD, as I mentioned above or  ":)isorder of Extreme Stress, not otherwise specified”, or “personality change due to classifications found elsewhere”. Further complications in diagnosis arise when one considers the high levels of co-morbidity which are seen in patients who have complicated trauma histories.  Diagnosis which often accompany C-PTSD are depression, OCD, Borderline Personality Disorder, Dissociative Disorders such as DID, agoraphobia and social phobia.  

In the context of BPD, some believe that BPD could be divided between suffers that experienced trauma - C-PTSD - and those that did not - BPD. An alternative is to see C-PTSD as a comorbidity with BPD when trauma is a factor.
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
Turkish
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12183


Dad to my wolf pack


« Reply #2 on: November 07, 2022, 09:05:55 PM »

Excerpt
Her abuse was (and still is) mostly emotional, and she also exaggerated my health conditions/Illnesses. As a result, I was over-doctored and everything that went on with my health was under a microscope.

It makes sense then how you were "trained" to obsess over the same things. As a child, you had no psychological defenses against seeing how things were.
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
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