Would you consider suing a mental health provider that did this? (off topic)

[NarcsEverywhere]

Posting here, as it's the best place for me to get advice on it, as people have read my previous rantings here.

But basically this:

First, I show up at this place, and go through 4 counselors, because counselors are fleeing for higher paying work, then I go through a couple of counselors, who both quit, one for higher paying work, one out of apathy. The next one is fairly good, but goes on vacation for 2 months without my knowledge, then switches locations, and there's confusion about this as my friend kills himself, and I frantically call and talk to different people trying to get help. But I am depressed so not as assertive as I normally was. I finally get fed up and go complain for help, they throw people on who hate my complaining, then I talk to my counselor, complain to him, then explain that a lot of it is because if my friend needed help from them, he may have killed himself.

Then my counselor is mostly validating and positive, but as the relationship progresses, I realize he won't change much for me. When I'd struggle, he'd ramble about nonsense, and then I'd feel more overwhelmed and bitter, ask for him to be more considerate, but he never would. Ended up having this whole situation with Narcissistic abuse in my life come to light, especially with my Dad and neighbor, who pushed me over the edge. As I became higher needs, from trying to stand up to them both, my counselor guilt trips me, abandons me, does bait and switch tactics and even acts like I am not important whatsoever, like leaving a session on the phone for other people... when I am struggling. In other words, he Narcissistically abused me himself. So, then I call his boss, and he gaslights me, and I send an email to the same boss and one of his bosses, no response... I even told them this whole story.

To me, this is about the worst neglect that a mental health provider can have. They are covering their liabilities now and deserve to get sued. But I don't have the means, financially, emotionally and strategically. But it seems pretty horrid to me.

The end result is more trauma, and distrust with mental health providers, but I am switching to a new one, and gonna try again, they seem better as they've helped me with crisis there. Oh, and it contributed to the hallucination I deal with, that acts up when under stress, or when I'm super not grounded, of frogs, the same frogs I heard on a super stressful night. Did I mention my counselor "showed up" to my house to meet me, since I have agoraphobia, didn't knock, or call, even though I asked him to call, and showed up early (and left), and this was AFTER I had hallucinations, the guy had no empathy.

Fine, maybe people in my life were dysfunctional, but doesn't there need to be a higher standard for mental health providers, since it's their job, and they are in a position of power and responsibility, with this very topic?

[Riv3rW0lf]

I'm sorry Narcs but this goes above my pay grade on this forum 

I am joking here but truly, honestly, I get that this is how you experienced things, and I am sorry you are not feeling supported by the counselors who were in charge of supporting you. I do think we all have to remember though that counselors are not super-heros... They don't hold all the answers either. They are humans like us, dealing with their own problems like us. They can provide an ear, but they also have biases and filters. They have a history and they are not all equal.

I hope you find the counselor you need, one with whom you can build a trustful relationship that will facilitate your path and healing. 

[Pook075]

Hey Narc, I completely agree with River, you haven't found the right counselor yet and just need to continue your search.  As far as suing them, I can't answer that either, but it does sound like you went through a number of therapists and none of them were the correct fit for your life.

Just keep your head up, keep searching, and keep moving forward.  The right one will surface for you eventually.

[NarcsEverywhere]

Hey thanks Pookie and Riv3rw0lf, I’ve totally been understanding with the difficulties of the job, limitations of counselors, and even how I could be difficult, but I feel like understanding has to end somewhere and you have to draw a line.  

People will die if the whole system is broken, and if the mental health providers are demoralized that bad, and neglectful, it’s actually a disservice to patients who are struggling a lot, it can be worse than no help, because you get the impression that you don’t matter.

Anyways, I agree that they are just human and also I agree that I just need to search for the right counselor. Probably won’t get a great one until I can afford that, but hopefully better than last time. Hoping to try a woman, even though that’s worked out poorly in the past. I need more emotional maturity.

Thanks for the responses.

[Kayteelouwho]

Heyyy,

I do happen to agree it doesn't sound like you have found a counsellor to help with your mental health and wellbeing.

I am sorry that its like the mental health system has failed you and that is tough, I do think you will find the right therapy for you just keeping looking.

And I'm sorry for your loss of your friend grief is tough and a process.