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Author Topic: BPD Sister doing the "love/hate" thing after I stopped her suicide attempt  (Read 484 times)
In_Virginia
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Relationship status: Estranged
Posts: 1



« on: July 08, 2023, 12:14:01 PM »

Hi Everybody. This post is about my little sister. I’m 60 and she is 55.  We live 8 hours apart. Our parents are both deceased and my sister is estranged from most of our friends and family including her 19-yr-old daughter.

She lost her job because she needs both hips replaced and is awaiting an August surgery date. She’s in a wheelchair now. She alienated most of her family and friends who she'd been "couch surfing" with, so she has no real home and nowhere to go except a nursing home. At first she claimed it was a “blessing” but now she hates everything and everybody associated with the nursing home. I tried to help by sending flowers, care packages, that kind of thing. Everything was ok with us until last Thursday.

She texted me on Thursday saying she wanted to kill herself and was looking around her room to find something to do it with. I asked her to call the suicide hotline. She said she didn't want to be saved. I immediately called the nursing home and told them. I soon received a very hateful text from her that said:

"Thanks for nothing. They are sending me to the psych ward with no pain meds.
THANK YOU SO F***ING MUCH.
F*** YOU.
Thanks for your help. And if you think I'll get past this and me and you will be okay? You're wrong. You've just made it so I have no one now.
You were it now you're Gone
my Choice   
I have no options so I'm suicidal so let's lock her up with no pain meds. That'll help.
Goodbye."

Then she unfriended me and blocked me on Facebook.

Since I’m not listed as a contact for HIPPA purposes  I was not able to find out what happened after that.

Today is my birthday.  To my surprise, she unblocked me and sent another text that said  "Happy Birthday I love you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️".  No mention of what happened on Thursday.

I’ve been through this before, so many times, and each time after months or even years, I would extend the olive branch (even if the rift wasn’t my fault) because I wanted to be friends again. But I feel differently this time and not sure I want to fix it. It's just a matter of time before it happens again. I’m so tired of this. I'm very hurt right now. 

Thank you for letting me vent.
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zachira
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Posts: 3458


« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2023, 12:31:55 PM »

I am so sad for you hearing about how your sister has treated you after all the support you have given her. I am no longer in direct contact with my sister with NPD and have very limited contact with my brother with BPD. You are the only person who knows what kind of contact you want to have with your sister. Know that you can change the status of your contact with your sister any time. Indeed many members on this site, go through periods of low contact, no contact, and some decide to permanently go no contact with their disordered family members.
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