More about switching schools

[maxsterling]

We switched the kids' school today.   It went as well as it could, but part of me feels extremely sad about the whole ordeal.  I am mainly sad because we put the kids thru this confusion again. 

I've come to realize that this has little to do with the school or kids.  It's mostly about W and how she feels about her job.

She went from being optimistic about her job to completely hating it and everyone she works with in a week's time.  I may have been in denial, but I expected this.  Having the kids at the same school with her put added pressure on her.  Now that the kids are in a different school, I think 90% likely W does not finish out the year.

I understand her complaints.  Teaching is a difficult job.  Dealing with behavior problems is tiring.  Dealing with co-workers is sometimes not easy.  But once again she is treating this completely black/white.  One thing goes wrong, and the whole ship goes down.  She has already rearranged her classroom 4-5 times in a week thinking that will solve her problems.  No different than at home, where furniture gets rearranged monthly.  At least our kids are no longer on the same ship.

And, of course, the blame is on me now, for forcing her to go back to work.  Yikes.  I am just going to step out of that one and do my best not to argue back at how absurd that is.  The only thing I ever suggested to that effect was that we could not move or upgrade our living situation without additional income. 

The other thing she is frustrated about is the job takes her away from the kids.  She seems envious of the time I have with them.  Last night she was mad because the kids were leaving her to come to me to ask questions about this or that.
  Why?  She does not make herself available to them.   Again, this is a distorted reality - she could choose to spend more time with the kids whether she has a job or not yet does not choose that.  She could say that she is going to wake up earlier on Saturday, feed the kids breakfast, and take them somewhere.  Instead, she sleeps in, I do something with the kids until she finally gets going, and then looks for my lead to take the kids somewhere.  It's not about what I am doing wrong, it is about what she is choosing not to do.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.