Black hangers

[dtkm]

So now it’s the black hangers!  I never thought that I would have a conversation about hangers, but then again I never thought about most of the crap in my life nowadays!  My uBPDh bought 2 packs of hangers when he moved back in, one was black hangers and one was white hangers. The majority of our other hangers are white or the wire ones. I put away both of our laundry most of the time, but when o haven’t had time and my h is trying to show “that he doesn’t need me” he puts it away…what a rebel thing huh! !  The last 2 times he has done so, I have noticed that clothes that were hung in my closet were on the floor. I realized today that he is “taking back” all of the hangers that he bought!  So I took all of the black hangers out of my closet and nicely hung them in his closet. Hoping to save me from having to continually have to pick up my clothes after he takes them. I am not wanting to stoop to his level, and just want to ignore his kid shenanigans  Is what I have done ok?  I literally hung them with all of his other hangers, I didn’t throw them on the ground or anything like that.

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[thankful person]

That’s exactly what I would do these days in such a situation. I normally find my dbpdw does not bother taking an issue further if she doesn’t get the drama and emotional reaction she was aiming for. Good luck!

[Notwendy]

I think it's time he put his own clothes away, on his own hangers, in his own closet.

I wouldn't say a word about it and don't react emotionally. It's good you just hung the clothes on "his" hangers and didn't respond with throwing his on the floor.

Without saying anything, buy him his own laundry basket for his laundry. If you can find a matching black one- great but if not, be sure it's a different color than the ones you use- this is going to be *his* laundry basket.

That's where his clothes go if you take them out of the dryer. If he wants them hung up - he can do it himself. No need to say anyting- just leave them there.

This is a form of "natural consequences". He can have his own hangers if he wants, and so can you. No big deal. But if he's going to throw your clothes on the floor, that is disrespectful behavior.  You were thinking "his and hers" - sharing. He wants his own- so OK- his hangers, his closet- his clothes- are his responsibility. You continue to keep your cool. It's just another way to manage the laundry.