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THE PSYCHOLOGY OF PERSONALITY DISORDERS
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Author Topic: Is cutting and suicidal ideation common to all pwBPD?  (Read 22879 times)
Joshua
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« Reply #10 on: October 22, 2008, 05:13:24 PM »

Another problem with suicide in BPD is it is hard to tell if they actually intended DEATH to happen. Most BPD and other personality disorder suicide attempts are done within the presence of others, leading to questions about suicidal intent. Contrast this to mood disorders where suicide rarely takes place in the presence of others. BPDs also lack a set date/plan for suicide and it is usually an impulsive act. This too differs from mood and other mental health disorders. I agree with walrus. They are out to hurt others by hurting themselves. My ex has had multiple "suicide attempts", although i think she consciously made sure she would be found. She would always call me after cutting herself or ODing on pills. She would then blame me for her pain. Saying, if i would have only acted in such a such a way she wouldn't have been in soo much pain and wanted to kill herself. Same goes for cheating. After she cheated on me she admitted it was just to get me back and show me she could hurt me the way i "hurt" her.

This kind of story disturbs me, in a way. I'm not saying your BP wasn't threatening/attempting "for the drama" as it were, but as a friend of a BP who successfully committed suicide, I take ALL threats/attempts extremely seriously- even veiled. And trust me- my friend fully intended to kill herself (self-inflicted gunshot to the head).

Please please PLEASE don't generalize all BPs as not intending to really kill themselves.
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Bitzee
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« Reply #11 on: October 22, 2008, 05:27:16 PM »



I second what you have said, Joshua, I lost a friend, too.

I would never characterize their self-harm or suicidal ideation or attempts as "selfish" acts.  Their pain is Unbearable.
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tired_mom
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« Reply #12 on: October 25, 2008, 02:10:58 PM »

I too second Joshua (or is it third?) in taking all BPD suicide talk seriously.

When my 16 y/o BPDd voices her suicidal idealizations - i listen. It is her attempt to seek help to push the thoughts away before they overcome her ability to cope with carrying them out. She doesn't always voice them however. She has attempted suicide

(8 times in the last 4 years) . I am trying to keep her from adding to the statistic of succeeding.

There are many aspects of BPD and to generalize that threats of suicide is all drama can lead others on this board to wrong conclusions, with a BPD in their lives.

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dados76
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« Reply #13 on: October 25, 2008, 03:03:57 PM »

I have to take all suicide threats seriously. My boyfriend works closely with his counselor, but in general his pattern is to not say anything to other people until the crisis is in the past, sometimes weeks. this pattern has led his therapist to suggest inpatient to him at times which he does not want to do. He does come from a very abusive history, some of which I was in his life and witnessed. Tip of the iceberg kind of things. I cant honestly say i would have survived living his life. It is one of my greatest fears that he would commit suicide without saying anything beforehand so i try to encorage him to talk whenever he is feeling bad.
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sharky


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« Reply #14 on: March 09, 2011, 06:10:20 AM »

Does everyone with BPD cut or self-mutilate. My mom fits alot of the description, but never any cutting that I am aware of.
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havana
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« Reply #15 on: March 09, 2011, 09:44:04 AM »

My wife never did.
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Randi Kreger
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« Reply #16 on: March 10, 2011, 11:02:15 PM »

Does everyone with BPD cut or self-mutilate. My mom fits alot of the description, but never any cutting that I am aware of.

No. Therapists get this wrong a lot.
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Sir5r
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« Reply #17 on: March 11, 2011, 11:50:07 AM »

it's not always blatant. My BPD wife is a scab scratcher and picker.  There are some cuts that are years old.
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Bluepanda
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« Reply #18 on: March 16, 2011, 10:12:36 PM »

My ex sometimes bite's and picks at her lips to the point where they bleed and get very sore. I used to have to constantly pull her hand away while we were watching a movie or something, she'd just sit there destroying her lips i don't think she even realised she was doing it.  Sometimes we couldn't even kiss or make out because her lips were so sore.

It only seem'd to happen when she was nervous or stressed out like when people bite there nails, I don't know if it's a BPD thing or just common but sometimes her lips looked really painful, surely it cant be normal.
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greenjay
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« Reply #19 on: May 02, 2011, 01:25:55 PM »

My m has had suicidal tendencies ever since I can remember. She would hold a sharp knife to her wrists and neck, she would put her head in the oven, take a bottle of sleeping pills, etc. It was a very stressful time in the household, and my father did not know what to do so he did nothing. My m is now 80 and continues to do the same ___. Last summer it was a bottle of rubbling alcohol and some sleeping pills. It is truly amazing that she is still alive, at the ripe old age of 80! Triggers are when she is overwhelmed or stressed, feels abandoned, when she has returned for a trip, or at christmas time. I don't get it. I am slowly getting it, with the help of this site, however! It makes me so sad and I pity her so much. I have tried desperately to get her help, but she wants no part of it.
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