Question for the group: what is the difference between disengaging and giving our BPD the "silent treatment"?
Disengaging is a conscious process. It's a part of radical acceptance that the r/s is not a healthy one and disengaging is necessary for you to heal. There are tools we use to disengage and they take time to fully embrace.
We use NC, which in part can be seen as encompassing silent treatment but more directly it is not as matter of fact as that.
For our disordered partners, disengagement is a part of splitting and dissociation. It's an unconscious process that is part of a hallmark of the disorder. Silent treatment is an ironic form of self protection that they utilize to assist in dissociation. For the nons, it's a form of emotional abuse.