Hey afterdeath... . I'm sorry to hear you are struggling today. It's great you decided to reach out here.
I know the grief can seem overwhelming at times... . I don't see allowing yourself to experience these emotions as "growing weaker"... . quite the opposite in fact. If you have somewhere private, have a damn good cry!... . I always felt this was like the release of days of emotional pressure building up.
Things are still very immediate and raw for you... . lean into those feelings... . they will pass.
Thank you Newton. As always I highly appreciate you. Thanks for the tip, you are right, when I do cry it feels like an emotional release, I will give it a good sob fest on the dive home.
This reminds me of the Dane cook skit where he plans to have a good cry.
Thank you for the validation. At a near six months many are confused at why I'm not over it and what's wrong with me so I just bottle it up to myself mostly going through the motion of the days routine numb to the world until faking it becomes too much and I break down.
A good cry may do me some good.
