Looking back now I realize I was actually in love with a fantasy in my own mind. I don't really think these people are capable of loving.
Now you're talkin'.
Need = love. This isn't limited to romantic relationships. This is how they function in friendship, with family, and on, and on. You aren't the first person she has mistreated. There were others before you, and there will be others after you. That's why I'm encouraging you to not take this personally.
It's not about you. Remind yourself of that often.
You deserve better.