I want her back - she is ignoring me

[hurting300]

Ah, the infamous borderline silent treatment.  Oh, you are indeed being punished, friend.  For sins your could never even imagine.  Things you never did, of course, but it hardly matters to her.  You are guilty and you will be mercilessly punished.  I've been there.  Almost an entire year now and not a word of contact.  She just up and disappeared one day.  It hurts worse than anything I've ever known, but while the pain never really goes away, you do get used to it.  Contacting her is only going to drive her further away.  Best thing you can do right now is to just step back, take a deep breath, and realize that this is going to last for a while.  Forever?  Maybe, maybe not.  But it is going to last for a while.  You can be sure of that.  You are are being punished and you will be punished as long as she decides you deserve to be punished.  Nothing you can do about it.  You are stirring up horrible feelings inside of her and that's all your fault.  At least it is in her head.  I'm really sorry, man.  I know it sucks.  And it hurts like hell.

Take the advice of the people on this forum and spend some time focusing on you.  I know you aren't going to forget her.  I haven't forgotten my ex either.  But I have made some positive changes in my life.  Do the same.  Work on you.  After you do, you will be a far more desirable man to her if she does come back and if not you are a far more desirable man for any woman.  You'll also be a better man for yourself!  There really is nothing you can do at this point to change her.  She's a very sick person and her thinking is deeply disordered.  She is seeing the world filtered through a lens of suspicion, betrayal, and paranoia.  You can't change that, man.  Neither can I.  All we can do is cope.  And work on us.

Merry Christmas and all the best in the coming year.  It does get easier.  Promise.

she never told you it was over? Mine did that. She just left... .

[cosmonaut]

she never told you it was over? Mine did that. She just left... .

She did.  She called me.  She wouldn't see me.  She refused.  Said it would just be too hard for her.  She couldn't even really explain why she was breaking up, except that she wasn't going to change her mind and it didn't matter what I said.  She said it was nothing I had done or hadn't done.  She just couldn't do a relationship.  Sorry, but it's over.  You know the story.  Formally the man of her dreams, the love of her life, the best thing to ever happen to her, the greatest blessing she's ever had, ad nauseum.  Then... .poof she's gone.  Just like that.  Never did find out why.  That was the last I heard of her.

[fred6]

she never told you it was over? Mine did that. She just left... .

She did.  She called me.  She wouldn't see me.  She refused.  Said it would just be too hard for her.  She couldn't even really explain why she was breaking up, except that she wasn't going to change her mind and it didn't matter what I said.  She said it was nothing I had done or hadn't done.  She just couldn't do a relationship.  Sorry, but it's over.  You know the story.  Formally the man of her dreams, the love of her life, the best thing to ever happen to her, the greatest blessing she's ever had, ad nauseum.  Then... .poof she's gone.  Just like that.  Never did find out why.  That was the last I heard of her.

It does suck. Mine did the same thing cosmonaut. One day everything seems mostly ok, then the next day BAM. It's over. Said that she loved me and that I hadn't done anything wrong. Haven't seen or talked to her since I moved out 14 weeks ago. I'm fairly certain that the guy that she was cheating on me with will suffer the same fate eventually. Even if he doesn't, he has his work cut out for him.

[Deeno02]

I didnt get any contact. Im thankful, yet a little sad. Oh well.

[maxen]

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