Feel like I lost all my friends from this relationship

[Boisnix79]

Hey All,

I'm just wondering what happened. My life was full with friends and so many things to do, I was invited somewhere every weekend it seemed like... . then i met my BPDEX and we became lost in a relationship. She got very jealous when I hung out with my friends so I kind of well... . didn't. I ended up seeing them occasionally but when I did for the last 6 months of the relationship I was definitely not in the best shape... . I was basically a shell I felt like... .

My friends all went on with their lives for the time that mine was in total turmoil. I think i just needed to share how I'm feeling... . lonely and like all the hurt of my life is back with the loneliness... .

I don't live near family so at this moment, 2 weeks out of breaking up... . I feel pretty damn alone... .

I think I need to go visit family and get my head put back on straight. I'm not sure... . I'm depressed, I know that for sure... .

What i do know is that this wasnt worth it in. I wish I never met her.

[Confused?]

Same thing happened to me except I still have my friends. She didn't have any and always wanted to hang with me. She would guilt trip me into staying home with her because she didn't want to be alone plus she was jealous of the girls and felt like I would cheat. Thankfully after she left me for someone else my friends could see how crazy she was after a few stories. She also was friends with them and made stuff up about everyone in the group. If I wasn't living with one of my friends at the time I might not have any left either.

Stay strong. We all had the same ride.

[Mr gaga]

I lost every single one of my friends after she left. She spread so many stories around about me that no one wanted anything to do with me, my own brother turned against me. All I have is my parents now, its really sad that this one person would hurt me so much even after the fact. She really hates me and its sad because i believed that she really loved me at some point

[Mutt]

Hey All,

I'm just wondering what happened. My life was full with friends and so many things to do, I was invited somewhere every weekend it seemed like... . then i met my BPDEX and we became lost in a relationship. She got very jealous when I hung out with my friends so I kind of well... . didn't. I ended up seeing them occasionally but when I did for the last 6 months of the relationship I was definitely not in the best shape... . I was basically a shell I felt like... .

My friends all went on with their lives for the time that mine was in total turmoil. I think i just needed to share how I'm feeling... . lonely and like all the hurt of my life is back with the loneliness... .

I don't live near family so at this moment, 2 weeks out of breaking up... . I feel pretty damn alone... .

I think I need to go visit family and get my head put back on straight. I'm not sure... . I'm depressed, I know that for sure... .

What i do know is that this wasnt worth it in. I wish I never met her.

I don't sense that you're talking about a smear campaign. I'm sorry that you lost your friends. Is it because you were more attentive to her needs? Perhaps boundaries would have helped here?

You make a valid point with loneliness, good idea reconnecting with family and people.

[Boisnix79]

NO no smear campaign. Just my own single mindedness on her. I neglected my relationships and now they are neglecting me... . Lesson learned... .

The next relationship will be one with balance and respect of the other people in my life.

Actually i'm lucky because as she is trying to get back with me somewhat, she isnt the kind of person to smear me. She dysregulates to be sure, but she seems to have more control over actions outside of directly at me... . She would feel silly smearing me, and she wouldnt do that to me. Thanks GOd.

I actually respect her in many ways and we may be able to be friends when she is able.

[Narellan]

Lost my best friend and parents and sister. Just started contact again with parents, but have lost my best friend... . To him. Pain pain pain but can only get better from here. He also had friended half a dozen of my friends on FB and has contacted them since the split to paint me black, and give his side. I haven't spoken to any of them since the split. I didn't want to bag him in case he came back... . Not happening now, but it's not in my personality to do that anyhow. Plus I love him. But yep I hear you! Wish to god I'd never met him.

[Boisnix79]

Hi Narellan,

Sorry to hear your story, it is sad and I hope it gets better:)

I will say this to your comment though. You say you love him still... . I'd highly recommend you thoroughly do the 5 stages of detachment to the right... . I'm fairly certain that what we both thought of as love, is actually the disorder of our own that allows us to continue this dance.

I dont love my ex, and to be honest I dont think love was ever the right word for it.

Message me privately and I'll show you my whole 5 stages worksheet I filled out if youd like... . Opened my eyes big time.

Youre better than to "love" someone that would do what he has done.

Trust that