Ideas on how to keep from going back?

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Dude... .We both went through similar things. You remember my stories. We both have very similar ex's... I think you know what you need to do. You need to not respond or give her any indication that you are interested. She doesn't exist anymore... Pretend she doesn't exist. Treat her as though she doesn't exist. You know what getting back together with her means. You know what even talking to her means... She will eventually lose interest if you don't give in to any of her attempts at contact... Go out, hang out with your friends, meet new women, enjoy your life, and ignore anything she throws at you and laugh it off...

Seriously, try and get a restraining order or a PFA or something along those lines... Make it illegal for her to contact you. Honestly, as much as I hate my ex, I'm actually glad that she got a restraining order against me as it forced both of us into no contact and turned out to be more of a blessing... .I haven't heard so much as a peep from my ex in 9 months and I have a new girlfriend now, and my life is grand...

She's alone and doesn't have any supply most likely and that's why she keeps bothering you. She needs someone else to be distracted by... A new supply source.

Going back to her will only mean more pain and suffering for you... Avoid at all costs. Focus on all of the bad things she's done to you... Remember them. Ask yourself how you can still love someone who treated you so poorly...

[FallenOne]

Dude... .We both went through similar things. You remember my stories. We both have very similar ex's... I think you know what you need to do. You need to not respond or give her any indication that you are interested. She doesn't exist anymore... Pretend she doesn't exist. Treat her as though she doesn't exist. You know what getting back together with her means. You know what even talking to her means... She will eventually lose interest if you don't give in to any of her attempts at contact... Go out, hang out with your friends, meet new women, enjoy your life, and ignore anything she throws at you and laugh it off...

Seriously, try and get a restraining order or a PFA or something along those lines... Make it illegal for her to contact you. Honestly, as much as I hate my ex, I'm actually glad that she got a restraining order against me as it forced both of us into no contact and turned out to be more of a blessing... .I haven't heard so much as a peep from my ex in 9 months and I have a new girlfriend now, and my life is grand...

She's alone and doesn't have any supply most likely and that's why she keeps bothering you. She needs someone else to be distracted by... A new supply source.

Going back to her will only mean more pain and suffering for you... Avoid at all costs. Focus on all of the bad things she's done to you... Remember them. Ask yourself how you can still love someone who treated you so poorly...

[SuperJew82]

Yes, you are exactly right. I'm sitting here taking a day off of work right now... .I'm in my backyward with my laptop just goofing around and about to tackle some of my to do list. It's about 75F out here, the breeze is rustling through the trees, and I'm noticing leaves fall down from some of my trees. It's fall. I'm not anxious or nervous just content.

I need to make it a habit to return to this site every once in a while to reflect on what I've been through and where I want to go. It feels good just writing about things and putting them down into words for some reason.

I'm going forward not backward... .yes, any communication with her equals pain. Always does. Always will. The good times will always eventually turn into stress, pain, and agony. I'm ashamed of all the attention that I allowed her to take away from my family, friends, and myself. I'm not addicted like a crackhead to my phone anymore!

I will never be lonely enough to go through that again. She is blocked on all fronts and I have not heard from her in over a month. The only places she pops up are on every dating site that I look at. I just click " block and report " to make sure I don't see her profile and she doesn't see mine.

I don't think she is a bad person - but she is years away ( assuming she goes to therapy and stays in it) from being healthy and somewhat compatible with a mature relationship. I can't put myself through another month of that - not much less years. I wish her the best and hope that she can be happy someday, but I have my own life to live.

[hope2727]

Just checking in. I hope you are doing ok. I am having a weak moment myself. I really miss him even all these years later. Thought I'd resist any cyber peeking by writing here. Now on to make some supper and plan my weekend. Hope all is well with and you are staying strong. Hugs.

[SuperJew82]

I'm actually doing alright, thanks for checking on me. I just get little moments of hurting, but I just remember why I chose to let her go.

The key is to drop the rose-coloured glasses and remember how miserable you were for the most part. The good times never lasted that long.

I think that is awesome that you made some plans for the weekend! I did the same thing and was so busy I didn't get a chance to think about it all much.

Keeping yourself busy is paramount sometimes! It's a big world out there with all sorts of things to do!