Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
December 22, 2024, 08:07:56 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits. Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
222
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Pending Divorce  (Read 515 times)
Charles1
Fewer than 3 Posts
*
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Posts: 1


« on: March 26, 2018, 10:35:10 AM »

I have been separated from my wife for 2 months (her decision). She gave me non contested divorce papers 3 weeks ago. I signed them and she picked them up on Mar 12. During this time she was suppose to change utilities over to her name, but has not completed this to date and I have no idea if she has filed. We were in communication during this time but i have not heard from her in 4 days. Any idea what i should do? I've not reached out to her. BTW- this would be her 4 divorce and she is in her late 40's.
Logged
Panda39
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Relationship status: SO and I have been together 9 years and have just moved in together this summer.
Posts: 3462



« Reply #1 on: March 26, 2018, 10:54:39 AM »

I have been separated from my wife for 2 months (her decision). She gave me non contested divorce papers 3 weeks ago. I signed them and she picked them up on Mar 12. During this time she was suppose to change utilities over to her name, but has not completed this to date and I have no idea if she has filed. We were in communication during this time but i have not heard from her in 4 days. Any idea what i should do? I've not reached out to her. BTW- this would be her 4 divorce and she is in her late 40's.

You should be able to check with court to see if the papers were filed or not. 

As for the utilities can you just let them know you are going through divorce and no longer live there and get yourself removed?

Panda39
Logged

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and just said, I just don't care" -Pink
ForeverDad
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
Posts: 18513


You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...


« Reply #2 on: March 26, 2018, 05:30:56 PM »

Hmm... .Before you contact her check with your county's domestic relations court or look up their online case listings to0 determine whether she's filed yet.  You could offer to deliver them to court yourself. Thought  Understand there may be a filing fee and if you bring the paperwork in then you may need to pay the fees.

Do you have any joint ownerships or liabilities with her?  Deeds, mortgages, liens, loans, titles, bank accounts or credit accounts?  Get them closed out, they may be a headache to fix later.  Once the divorce is final it may be extremely hard to get the court to motivate her to work with you fixing them.

And once you're divorced be sure to review all beneficiaries you have listed and update them.  Sometimes that happens where ex-spouses are left as beneficiaries long after the marriage is over.
Logged

Speck
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced since Mar 2018
Posts: 611



WWW
« Reply #3 on: March 26, 2018, 09:18:54 PM »

Welcome, Charles1!

 

Let me welcome you here to bpdfamily, and wish for you as much help and support as I have received.  It's clear you have a lot in common with many of us here. This is a community where we help each other, so I'm sure if you keep posting and reading you will find it helpful. It helps to know that you are far from alone.

Thank you for sharing what you have thus far:

We were in communication during this time but i have not heard from her in 4 days. Any idea what i should do? I've not reached out to her.

When I read this, I hear the worry in your question. I'm sorry you're going through this. I was in exactly your shoes recently. After I signed the uncontested divorce papers, my uBPDw didn't file for a couple of months. We were not in communication either. I found out about her actually filing by calling my lawyer and having him check the court system for me. I'm still waiting for the judge to sign off on the request for the divorce, but at least I know she's officially filed.

These things take time, and if the person driving the divorce has BPD, it really takes time. Do you think you could reach out to her to gently nudge her about following through?

I believe you will be greatly comforted by the support here and the fact that we really understand what you are going through. We've all been there to varying degrees. Take care of yourself. We will look out for future posts from you.

Keep writing, keep processing, keep learning!


-Speck
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!