What is with food and kitchens in children of uBPDm?

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

Bsane,

Omg! Dusting? That's a whole different thread    Kitchenophobia, and clean the house a phobia! 

gives me shivers just to think about it! 

js

[joiesophie]

Bsane,

Omg! Dusting? That's a whole different thread    Kitchenophobia, and clean the house a phobia! 

gives me shivers just to think about it! 

js

[sarah1234]

sometimes I read these threads and really start to wonder about my dad! I dont think he is BPD (well if he is, he is now cured as the past 8 years of him living with another woman other than my mum I have had limited but nice contact with him so have no idea if he is still the same way, as he seems to be totally different to the father I grew up with!). I think he was simply a control freak, but I understand how a lot of you feel. He has been an alcoholic for 30 years.

I had CBT when I was 19 and part of it was dealing with my food phobia. I could eat myself, but I couldn't bear anyone else to eat in the same room as me, whatosever. Mainly cos of the noise they make. I also am just only learning to cook.

I wasn't allowed in the kitchen at all either, whatsoever. We were not allowed to touch anything in the kitchen in case we made a mess. Our house was a sh** pit, cos my mum never did any cleaning! I remember him catching me making a sandwich once and he went mental. I was so scared of him coming home and catching me.

We had to sit in a certain way at the dinner table, with our sleeves pulled up and cutlery pointing downwards to prevent drips. He had a dirty old cloth next to him which he would wipe across your face if you made any mess.

We also had to finish the entire plate, and yep, he would make you sit there for as long as that took.

My mum was a terrible cook and her food was so bad, I remember chewing on one bit of tough meat for so long I was sick. After that I stopped eating meat altogether!

He also got my mum to buy him steak and other expensive things, and my sister and I grew up on the most bland frozen food diet imaginable because he would say anything else cost too much. I had never had a any foreign or much fresh food until I left home, and my sister had never eaten pizza. She also can't cook much. I never got bought any fruit apart from apples, and find it hard to eat fruit now cos I find it weird.

He would comment throughout the entire dinner about how you were eating, or cutting food.

I started binge eating during the day so that I wouldn't be able to eat my dinner so I wouldn't have to sit next to him. This is where I got my phobia from, I would totally freak out if someone was eating anywhere near me until I got some therapy for it. I used to get really angry and got scared I would hurt my mum if I carried on that way!

Dont even get me started about his control freak-ness about doors being closed in winter, or wearing shoes in the house

[organicallygrown]

Tivo8, that letter link you gave was hiliarous. OMG, the '... .now that your married you need to contribute at an adult level... .' that is spooky because I have heard those words echo from my mother. WOW.

I also am going to think more on this because I never put my own food issues together but reading all of yours... .I can see a common thread. I can't stand to hear people eat and in school, I couldn't eat in the cafeteria because I couldn't handle knowing we all had full stomachs together in our next class. Isn't that just bizarre?

My mom when we were little made us eat canned wax beans and what my sister and I called 'Monkey muffins' because they tasted like what a monkey cage would smell like. I can't reason to this day why a mother would make children eat those things when there was a full range of choices out there. But she insisted we eat them all the time. I'm not sure if anyone has had canned wax beans, but they taste just like that... .a bean that has been waxed and sitting in a can for like 15 years. That and washed down by a 'monkey muffin' with who knows what inside of it. Looking back at it now, I can't imagine why she would make us eat it. It wasn't like broccoli or salad or something moms want their kids to eat. Have you ever heard of someone dying because they didn't eat wax beans or some odd foul homeade muffin? Just bizarre to think about. I'm a mom and I wouldn't force feed them odd foods over and over again and insist they eat it.

Just an odd thing that this post reminded me about. huh.