HardHabit - I was referring more to just the B/W splitting thing in general, not so much any kind of social 'campaign', as it were. I'm less familiar with that, as my situation has been more one of isolation. We shared very few common friends, and those we did - she never spoke to after our 'breaks'. I come from a small family (none of who she cared for much), and she's estranged from her entire family (surprise).
The nearest I can relate to what you speak of is with my
perception of what occurs with her "virtual" friends. I have no idea what sort of things she tells these people (she has said she never says anything about 'us', but when we recycle, I've always been uncomfortable with the fact that she effectively keeps me/us a secret. Even when I bought her the engagement ring - I'm not aware that she told
anyone at all. Strange?
Anyway, my point would be this - IF there's BPD or 'Cluster B' at work, then it seems more than likely that the black will eventually shift to white at some point again. In order to facilitate this, the extended cast of characters who were on the receiving end of the victim rants could very well find themselves painted black. They would almost have to as a way to justify the the split reversal. Am I making sense here?
Maybe when you are more confident or look healthy so that they see you as possible care takers again?
Maybe, but if in total NC (as has usually been the case for us), how would they know? I actually don't think it has anything to do with who or what we are or have become while apart. I believe it's 100% about
them and the mystifying perceptions they have about
their wants and needs as they hop from one emotional lily pad to the other.
