but I took a chance that he might be in a receptive mood (so brilliant, I know).
byasliver, I think the hardest part of trying not to get into an argument is to distinguish when he is nitpicking and is going to start an argument anyway. Like you, sometimes I'm too un-mindful and I don't realise it is happening, sometimes I have my hopes high and get disappointed... .
One thing I know, and that is: if he's trying to fight, no matter what answer you give, he will have something to argue about. This is why when I'm stuck in a situation like this and he is pushing me to give himsome sort of response, I would say something which is as emotionally detached/ logical thinking as possible (like, "Hmm... . Of course earning more is good, but that job is further away." And then just give my own opinion as little as possible.
But it's much easier said than done- I just failed last night