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Skills we were never taught
98
A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
Don't Be Invalidating
Listen with Empathy -
A Powerful Life Skill
Setting Boundaries
and Setting Limits
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Author Topic: Denial  (Read 588 times)
Jeansok
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 116



« on: June 06, 2013, 07:42:54 PM »

... . my husband tonight "you think im in denial, I think your in denial"... . ahhhhh! He's still willing to see the therapist again but now its about we both need to. I know im not perfect and have my own issues. Its just such a let down. He says he needs his space and thats all it is. But kindof weird he's still ok with being evaluated. Im seriously about to lose it.

He was talking to me I thought sarcastically... . he said he wasnt being that way. I cant even tell anymore and I get mad and frustrated easily anymore. Than he acts like everything is normal and im the crazy one. Using my words against me to say its me. How do u deal with this in a positive way when u know its his BPD
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RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

Mcgddss
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Divorcing
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« Reply #1 on: June 06, 2013, 07:47:37 PM »

Don't deal with it - take your break.  As you set the boundaries hopefully he will change the way he communicates.

Stay strong!

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Jeansok
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Married
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« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2013, 08:15:59 PM »

Thanks Smiling (click to insert in post) Its hard to pretend everything is ok when he finally comes around... .
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waverider
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Gender: Male
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: married 8 yrs, together 16yrs
Posts: 7407


If YOU don't change, things will stay the same


« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2013, 08:24:29 PM »

Having your own T does no harm if you can afford it. it may help you answer questions such as this.

Generally disengage from tit for tat discussions

Less words you use the less he can throw back. This is why trying to get them to do, or action anything rarely works as its like throwing words at a trampoline. They need to work stuff out for themselves.
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  Reality is shared and open to debate, feelings are individual and real
united for now
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: separated
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Talking about solutions create solutions


« Reply #4 on: June 07, 2013, 12:05:03 PM »

I believe we get super sensitive ourselves from the years of being on alert. We react rather than respond. This is also a sign that you aren't taking care of your own needs.

Can you find some time to decompress?
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