Borderline/Narcissitic?

[Turkish]

I have a friend who has a degree in psychology and told me that she is stressed and struggling to be a young adult and needs some guidance on how to manage her life.

She needs to find that guidance herself. In a romantic r/s, this complicates matters. Did you need someone to guide you, or did you mostly figure it out on your own, most likely with input from people you respect and trust?

Glad you got a chance to talk (for you). But it sounds like she is looking for a safe landing with you due to she and the other due having problems. Do you think this is respectful behavior, or more like that of a child running back home for safety after smashing the neighbor's windows? The question is, do you respect yourself enough to keep your boundaries strong and clear?

[Anomaly1]

I should also report that she said why didn't you tell me off? I said because i care and love you.

She ended the conversation with can i text you.

I agree she does and i think when she changes schools. She's going to my college here in the fall. I think things will turn around. Maybe her being away from me will make her think about things.Once she changes jobs.

On the topic of the other guy.I think it's a attention thing.I can't see her liking him more than me. And i told her when we had the conversation the other day that i don't want you doing this because you feel bad for me or you've seen the way other people are seeing me just to cover your butt.  Or doing this just to please yourself.    She said i'm not.You have to trust me.   

Does any of this sound like a personality order? I am going to support her. I don't think she will text me.  I don't want it to just be about me trying to talk to her at work.So everyone can see that she's made me better and such. 

[Turkish]

I should also report that she said why didn't you tell me off? I said because i care and love you.

She ended the conversation with can i text you.

I agree she does and i think when she changes schools. She's going to my college here in the fall. I think things will turn around. Maybe her being away from me will make her think about things.Once she changes jobs.

On the topic of the other guy.I think it's a attention thing.I can't see her liking him more than me. And i told her when we had the conversation the other day that i don't want you doing this because you feel bad for me or you've seen the way other people are seeing me just to cover your butt.  Or doing this just to please yourself.    She said i'm not.You have to trust me.   

Does any of this sound like a personality order? I am going to support her. I don't think she will text me.  I don't want it to just be about me trying to talk to her at work.So everyone can see that she's made me better and such. 

All I can say is good luck, A1. PD or not, focus on the behaviors. The communication tools (SET, etc... . ) here are tailored for pwBPD, but they work well on anyone. Keep your boundaries, respect and focus on yourself, and work on those Rescuer traits. There is nothing wrong with being a Rescuer (I'm one, my T admitted to being one). It's when we become enmeshed in a r/s with someone who desperately needs it where we may get lost. Maybe you will be friends later on, probably something more, it sounds like. If not a PD, then sometimes people just need more time to grow up. My 32 year old pwBPD tried desperately to grow up, but I triggered her, and she reverted to teenage behavior. She just couldn't keep it up. Now she needs to fall (again), and perhaps someday the high functioning uBPD mother of my children will get better deep down. On the surface? My problem due to my children. Deep down? 100% her problem. There is nothing more I can or will do for her. But that is me, in a nutshell.