Are we doomed to love them forever?

[Popcorn71]

For me, the love has now turned to hate.  I think it will stay that way.  the reality of how badly he treated me has finally sunk in.

[Kallor74]

Damn that is a great question.

I don't think we are doomed to "love" them forever as nothing in this life is forever.  We are all subject to the impermenance of life which includes our own feelings and emotions.

As for my own experience, i don't think i ever loved my exBPDgf.  I would always tell her after our numerous breakups and recycles that no one has affected me so deeply.  I think she thought i was saying how much i love her but i wasn't.  What she was in my mind was a younger version of my mother.  Cold and emotionless.  Selfish and callous.  She opened my eyes to alot of FOO issues i refused to look at for many years.  What i am is grateful she smashed my comfortable illusions. Like a wrecking ball to a glass house.