It's with a Sad heart that I am on this page

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

So I have been with my dBPDgf for the last five years.  These years have been bumpy/rocky to say the least.  It seems the relationship is deteriorating more and and more.  When it should be getting stronger throughout the years. 

So this past Mothers day was HECTIC to say the least. 

A small back story on this.  She went overnight on business to a seminar.  She also met up with an X while attending the seminar for Dinner the night before.  This is the same X that had caused her so much trouble etc.  So she gets home and is acting very off.  Not as talkative etc.  You know when you can tell something is bothering your significant other. 

Fast FWD to Mothers day.  I have a hard time with Mothers day for my own reasons.  She goes to church and I stay home and clean and just take in the quiet house.  She calls to see if I want to go to Lunch with her and her family.  I said no I was under dressed and would feel out of place.  Well that wasn't the answer she wanted she immediately got defensive and mad.  Well while I was cleaning her Ipod was On and I was going to cut it off so the battery wouldn't die.  She had left up a chat with her friend talking about her X that she had seen the previous weekend. 

This is what it said:

Her: So Met up with Denise and her gf last night.  Glad I did.  Nothing has changed.  She still takes my breath away and I still think she has to be the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

Friend:  Oh honey. Please don’t let this hurt u

Her: It didn’t hurt.  It made me so happy because seeing her was just a reminder that life can be so amazingly beautiful.  I’ve never felt the things she makes me feel with anyone else.  I cannot describe it.  It’s the most beautiful thing…The most beautiful kind of love.  Her eyes just absolutely took my breath away.  I’ve never ever seen anything so beautiful before and I look at over 300 pairs of eyes a week.  God Jenn….I hope and pray Sydney has someone in her life like that.  The world would be a perfect place if everyone felt that way about someone.  It brings me to tears.

Friend: Aww Cory that’s beautiful

Her: I know she’ll always be the love of my life.  Always.  Forever.  But if she doesn’t feel the same way I want her happinesss above my own.  I don’t know how she feels but I know if anything ever happened to me that I would die happy having had the opportunity to love her.  Promise me that if anything ever happens to me you’ll let her know how much I love her and how happy she made me.  Even though she may not share the same feelings and we aren’t together I’m such a blessed person having had the opportunity to love her.  Please promise me that.


Then she posted on Facebook 5 years ago I made a couple bad decisions that cost me greatly.  Not a day goes by that I don’t wish I had chosen differently.  Hopefully others will hear my story and make better choices.  (she’s writing a book about her experiences)  Which seems to me to be VERY focused on her X .

Ok back to Mothers day.  She was mad that I didn’t go so of course that turned into an argument and she said we need time apart.  So I said what does that mean…she said for me to date etc...   I told her no.  She says we are broken up…but the only thing that has changed has been her status on FB and she no longer TAGS me in anything and she’s talking to her daughter now about her X which she hasn’t done before.

So should I call her bluff and say ok we are broken up.  YOU pay your half the bills etc and we will be like roommates then?  Because right now I am footing the bill for everything.

I really don’t know if I want to continue in this crazy relationship anymore.

[seh77]

So I have been with my dBPDgf for the last five years.  These years have been bumpy/rocky to say the least.  It seems the relationship is deteriorating more and and more.  When it should be getting stronger throughout the years. 

So this past Mothers day was HECTIC to say the least. 

A small back story on this.  She went overnight on business to a seminar.  She also met up with an X while attending the seminar for Dinner the night before.  This is the same X that had caused her so much trouble etc.  So she gets home and is acting very off.  Not as talkative etc.  You know when you can tell something is bothering your significant other. 

Fast FWD to Mothers day.  I have a hard time with Mothers day for my own reasons.  She goes to church and I stay home and clean and just take in the quiet house.  She calls to see if I want to go to Lunch with her and her family.  I said no I was under dressed and would feel out of place.  Well that wasn't the answer she wanted she immediately got defensive and mad.  Well while I was cleaning her Ipod was On and I was going to cut it off so the battery wouldn't die.  She had left up a chat with her friend talking about her X that she had seen the previous weekend. 

This is what it said:

Her: So Met up with Denise and her gf last night.  Glad I did.  Nothing has changed.  She still takes my breath away and I still think she has to be the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

Friend:  Oh honey. Please don’t let this hurt u

Her: It didn’t hurt.  It made me so happy because seeing her was just a reminder that life can be so amazingly beautiful.  I’ve never felt the things she makes me feel with anyone else.  I cannot describe it.  It’s the most beautiful thing…The most beautiful kind of love.  Her eyes just absolutely took my breath away.  I’ve never ever seen anything so beautiful before and I look at over 300 pairs of eyes a week.  God Jenn….I hope and pray Sydney has someone in her life like that.  The world would be a perfect place if everyone felt that way about someone.  It brings me to tears.

Friend: Aww Cory that’s beautiful

Her: I know she’ll always be the love of my life.  Always.  Forever.  But if she doesn’t feel the same way I want her happinesss above my own.  I don’t know how she feels but I know if anything ever happened to me that I would die happy having had the opportunity to love her.  Promise me that if anything ever happens to me you’ll let her know how much I love her and how happy she made me.  Even though she may not share the same feelings and we aren’t together I’m such a blessed person having had the opportunity to love her.  Please promise me that.


Then she posted on Facebook 5 years ago I made a couple bad decisions that cost me greatly.  Not a day goes by that I don’t wish I had chosen differently.  Hopefully others will hear my story and make better choices.  (she’s writing a book about her experiences)  Which seems to me to be VERY focused on her X .

Ok back to Mothers day.  She was mad that I didn’t go so of course that turned into an argument and she said we need time apart.  So I said what does that mean…she said for me to date etc...   I told her no.  She says we are broken up…but the only thing that has changed has been her status on FB and she no longer TAGS me in anything and she’s talking to her daughter now about her X which she hasn’t done before.

So should I call her bluff and say ok we are broken up.  YOU pay your half the bills etc and we will be like roommates then?  Because right now I am footing the bill for everything.

I really don’t know if I want to continue in this crazy relationship anymore.

[Perdita]

So I have been with my dBPDgf for the last five years.  These years have been bumpy/rocky to say the least.  It seems the relationship is deteriorating more and and more.  When it should be getting stronger throughout the years.

From everything I've read on these boards, it usually gets worse not better. 

Well while I was cleaning her Ipod was On and I was going to cut it off so the battery wouldn't die.  She had left up a chat with her friend talking about her X that she had seen the previous weekend. 

This is what it said:

I totally understand you reading the chat.  Snooping is the only thing that has kept me somewhat sane this year.  The only way to get to the truth.  It must have been so hurtful to read those things.     She is clearly idealizing her ex.  She sounds obsessed with her. 

Ok back to Mothers day.  She was mad that I didn’t go so of course that turned into an argument and she said we need time apart.  So I said what does that mean…she said for me to date etc...   I told her no.  She says we are broken up…

I think it is pretty obvious that the whole Mother's Day thing is just an excuse.  If it wasn't this it would have been something else.  She is hoping to get back together with her ex. That's why she wants you out the way.

So should I call her bluff and say ok we are broken up.  YOU pay your half the bills etc and we will be like roommates then?  Because right now I am footing the bill for everything.

I really don’t know if I want to continue in this crazy relationship anymore.

Seh, I can't see how you can move on while still living under the same roof with her and paying her bills.  In typical BP style this gal wants her cake and eat it too.  It's up to you whether or not she does.

[seh77]

Perdita,

Thank you for your insight to my perdicament.

I have questioned myself on why I stay.  Issue that I know I now have to deal with. 

I just want to scream/cry/laugh all at the same time right now. 

What kills me is that she see's no reason for my confusion.  Boy her world is warped.

[Perdita]

I have questioned myself on why I stay.  Issue that I know I now have to deal with.

You've certainly found the right board, Seh. 

What kills me is that she see's no reason for my confusion.

They never do.