On top of that, I noticed intense dissociation when dancing, even when we were together on the dance floor at some point I felt she's not with me nor with anyone else but rather she's mentally alone in her own world. Empty, cold, dissociated eyes. That reminded me of the insanity she's dealing with (and of course triggered a lot of love and affection to her, wanting to be there for her, help her, and be the one she can always talk to about these feelings and situation, even post-factum)
maybe she is embracing her world. Dancing can induce trance states.