Wrong numbers and text meant for others from your ex

[enlighten me]

In the 2 1/2 years I was with my ex I never received a call from her or a text that were meant for someone else. In the last month I have had 3 or 4.

Has anyone else experienced this or have any thoughts about it?

[RisingSun]

No I haven't gotten this before. I just get random texts saying my dog misses me. And, that I'm stealing her mail 

[MrConfusedWithItAll]

In between the recycles I would get texts obviously not meant for me but meant for the guy she was dating.  This always made me chuckle and was my way of knowing she was not done with the recycling.  I might add that at the time I was never sure whether or not she was really dating others - she would say she was and then deny it saying it was all a wind up.  That was when she wanted me back.  I now know she did date.  Poor lady lives a confused life indeed.

[Loveofhislife]

Enlighten:  YES YES YES! He did that all the time to his ex. Purposely! Sometimes he would make up random texts just to throw her off--especially in the midst of their child support, but mostly to try to make her jealous. He frequently asked me when I would send him a text, "Was that meant for me?" Or "Who are you texting?" Project too much, me thinks!

[willtimeheal]

No I haven't gotten this before. I just get random texts saying my dog misses me. And, that I'm stealing her mail  

I am sorry rising Sun but the stealing mail made me laugh out loud.

You really can't make this stuff up. It's just so whacked.

[Popcorn71]

LOL yet another example of the weird behaviour so many of us have experienced.

During the 9 years I was with my ex he never sent me texts meant for other people or made wrong number calls to me.  However, he did send his ex (who by coincidence has the same name as me) a couple of 'I love you' type of texts that were meant for me - or so he said!  Looking back he was probably trying to upset her or make her jealous.

When he finally left for the replacement, I got a couple of calls from him where he sounded surprised when I answered and asked who I was.  He knew damn well who I was, he'd spent 9 years calling me and never asked before!  Anyway he just said he'd called the wrong number and hung up.  I also got a couple of texts from him that said things that didn't make sense to me.  Things like 'I have lots to tell you tomorrow' and 'Loads of news, can't wait to tell you'.  At this point we were barely in contact and certainly weren't meeting up so they must have been meant for the replacement.

At the time I didn't think much of it because I didn't know he had left for another woman.  I still thought the one thing he wouldn't do would be to cheat on me.  But looking back I think it was his way of trying to let me know that he was with somebody else.  He wanted me to find out but didn't want to come right out and tell me.

Since then, at a time I know was particularly bad for him, he text me once with another nonsense text that was worded as a reply to someone - 'All went well thanks, and yes please'.  I ignored it but I think it was an attempt to get me to contact him with him having the excuse that the text was mistakenly sent to me.

I think it's just another of the stupid games they play.

[Tiepje3]

It happened to me too. Never any mail or txt sent to me accidentally, until recently.

He hardly ever used my laptop, but for some reason some months ago he had checked his Gmail account on my computer. I didn't notice at first until I scrolled down a list of mails. Then I realised it wasn't my account that was open. I couldn't contain my curiosity when amidst all the commercial and work emails one female name popped up. I opened up the email and read a thread of mails full of inside jokes and secret meetings. When I confronted him with it, he said it meant nothing. He later admitted he had left it open on purpose (I think so he could blame me for reading his email). When he later broke into my Gmail account AND Facebook account he was able to justify his behaviour because "I had read his email too."

When things were really going downhill he 'accidentally' sent me a message that was meant for her, in which he declared his love for her. That was the end of our marriage (for me).

So... .my guess is... .be aware. It might be done on purpose so he/she doesn't have to tell you face to face something is going on.

[enlighten me]

Mine where when she was on a night out. They were to her sister and a girlfriend just saying where they were at or going to next.

The phone calls was supposedly to her sister during the day.

Nothing there to make me jealous of another man but I suspect the texts were to let me know she was out having a good time.

[myself]

My ex was too secretive to play this game.

Acting like she had nothing to hide.

Yet being the one who kept things hidden.

[topknot]

When he was mad at me once, I got a pic of him and some unattractive woman having margaritas and smiling stupidly.  I texted, "Why do I have a photo of you and some chick?"  He answered, "Oh, I'm so sorry, I don't know how you got on that thread."  At the time, I was devastated.  I was thinking, WHAAT?  When were you at some Mexican restaurant with some babe that looks like Mr. Ed? Now I just laugh, as I know it was intentional, and that was the best he could do to show me he was "sought after"... .okay... .

[Infared]

What I experienced is that BPD's will find ways, any way they can think of, to make contact without taking responsibility for the contact. When they do this "OH... .it was an accident... ." ... (yeah, right)... so since they have not initiated contact they do not have to take any responsibility for contacting you and act adult and treat you decently and also tell you WHY they are contacting you.  If its an accident the entire contact is then on YOUR emotional dime! They totally know this... .they are master manipulators, but try to fool us into thinking they are not.

Once you start to see the chinks in the armor and come out of the FOG,  it is pretty easy to spot.

They are extremely cunning.  Oh... accidental texts (mine runs around parking lots or inside supermarkets insanely trying to make is look like she is "accidentally" running into me).  

They don't even know why they do it I don't think... .except to control us and get info is all I could ever see. It is not like they care about us and want to see us or anything. At least that is my experience.

[ShakinMyHead]

Yes, enlighten me, my exBPDbf sent me drivel, texts, directly & solely to my Text #, but addressed it to "The Group", "The Group" that I am not even a part of? So, I receive this obscure text "To all" sent directly to me, without saying anything, without taking any responsibility for anything, not acknowledging anything that happened, his usual spin out, word salad, take no risk drivel. I call these "Fishing Texts". These are when he will just drop his line in the water to see if I'll bite. Sometimes I'll just get a letter, that's it. No word, I don't know if it's a butt text, a mistake, just pure insanity and text gas lighting. All him trying to gauge my responsiveness for a recycle. For my exBPDbf he is essentially saying "I would be willing to accept your apology now, if you decide to crawl back to me on your knees."  I'm sure. For all I know, he sends out quite a few of these at a time, and depending on who of his ex's still bites, and responds, or inquires about such a lacking communication on every level, is the next to be focused on for a recycle. Trust me, it's no great honor being the Lion's next meal. Specially when we are at the point in our relationship's where we've been recycled enough times to know exactly what we are walking back into, but we know enough to understand our own addictive tendencies. Then it's "Shame on us." and that seems to be the absolute worst, when we've colluded, and still have our arms out wanting, begging them for the "Hit." Knowing full well what we are in for… Sometimes on his iPhone he will start to write me a text, just so it shows up on my text as a conversation bubble, so, it looks to me like he's writing me a text. But he'll just write the bare minimum so I am just waiting endlessly for what ever he writing, of course, and nothing comes, but the bubble sits there to torture me. This is why it's so important to maintain absolute NC if possible, so, they cannot F--K with our heads. That's their favorite. Really sick... While other people are giving to each other in reciprocal relationships, we are chasing after these hurt & damaged people, to try to get them to stand still enough so we can teach them how to give? And they have no interest in learning. I often thought my exBPDbf has way better taste in partners then I do. He went after me, who could and wanted to give him the world, and I went after him, he, who only wanted to suck the marrow from my bones?    ugh... Hugs, SMH

[Pingo]

I've blocked his number on my phone (text & calling) with an app. so no 'accidents'. 

[grassfedk]

Yep!  My wife sent me a text a few months ago - clearly from the middle of a conversation with someone - saying, "And I didn't even know he was gay!"  I don't know who she was sending it to, but there it was.  (She used my name, not "he".) 

And of course - not that there's anything wrong with it - the funny thing is that I'm not gay.

[Infared]

I've blocked his number on my phone (text & calling) with an app. so no 'accidents'. 

+100

[hellokitty4]

Getting wrong texts happens to me at least once a week.  I am still in touch with my BPD friend although in a very controlled [her idea] way.  At first I thought the wrong texts were just that... .my friends think it's an intentional way of her letting me know what she's up to either to make me jealous or to see how I will react or to start some conversation or simply to test me.  I just laugh at it now. Sometimes I don't even tell her I got a wrong text meant for someone else.

[enlighten me]

I was also wondering whether some of it could be subconscious on their behalf?

What I mean is they know theyre going to send the text to someone else but select you as they are thinking about you and wanting to contact you.

I find this less plausible but Ive called someone once that I was thinking about rather than the person I meant to call.

[Loveofhislife]

I once saw a missed call on my phone from exbfNPD after many days of silent treatment. When I called him back, he said he was in the process of deleting phone numbers in his phone's directory. I played right into his hands and said, "you accidentally called me to let me know you were deleting me from the contacts in your phone?" It's a fishing expedition folks. It's more mind games, and it's sick. After years of NC with that pwNPD, I would occasionally have him dangle random emails. It is their way of validating themselves. And it is NOT accidental!