What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger?

[bunnysc]

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger?

Oh well I guess, great place with great people and posts thanks to BPD family…

My case, was hard as hell for me… I’ve been NC for almost 2 months. ‘‘ I met this Girl’’… well I didn’t, actually she contacted me via FB. We started seeing each other, going out and having a good time. A great time, we were always together ALWAYS!

One thing she did on the first dates was taking me to her EX boyfriend sister house for a few drinks. Wow this was a BIG red flag, stupid me going there but I really liked her and being with her so I accepted.

A week later she told me I was her girlfriend now, and how she loved me. I was everything for her. (GOD, talk about the RED FLAGS) I never thought she was or could be BPD…I fell in love with her. She told me it seems like we knew each other for years…  By the way she hated her family cause she said they treated her badly. I was her everything, she even  had plans to marry me; she even had a name for her future baby!

Like 1 month in to the relationship I started realizing how she always wanted to be with her weird friends boys and girls, I MEAN WIERD friends, (Including a Lesbian, which she visited at work and her house…Friends always smoking and drinking EVERY SINGLE TIME they met at one of their house… I told her I didn’t like her friends and what she was doing, so guess what? I had the power to quit the relationship with her for 1 week. It was a disaster for her; she cried begged me not to do it, you have no idea how intense it was! So back with her I was!  (I actually cared about her and liked her)

To make it short she always did whatever she wanted, she just disappeared for a day or for a night not even carrying, so I was the one ending the relationship the same day:

I was like ‘’F**& this I am tired of your lies your messed up friends, your life this is not ok.  I don’t want you in my life anymore, she always answered: ‘’OK’’ like she didn’t even care. At this time she was hanging out with her friends. She didn’t like me to call her when she was with them; she totally was a different girl with them. She never argued with me she never fought with me she just said ‘’OK’’ fine end the relationship bye... .(Talk about a BPD ‘’WAIF’’?)

ALWAYS, the next day she was the one crying calling me texting me saying how sorry she was and how she was going to change. ‘’I want to see you, I want to be with you please come back to me I am so sorry! I will leave my friends cause I love you.  I know they are bad. I didn’t answer her calls or texts. She went to my work place to talk to me beg me to go back with her... .

The recycle started since that day, we had great weeks and Hell weeks, I was always the one ending the relationship and she was the one BEGGIN to be back with me. We had like 30 recycles in 1 year and a half or maybe more. It was always for the same stuff, she disappearing, just flying away like I didn’t exist. NEXT day early morning she will start manipulating me with all her texting and calls to be back with her. AND back with her I was, starting again! HOW DUMB I was always there, even though I was the one ending the relationship.


The following happens:

We started all over again ONE more time; we were great, having a nice relationship! One day out of the sky she told me SHE WAS LEAVING, SHE DIDNT LOVE ME ANYMORE cause I treated her very bad. She was the one ending the relationship for good.

I received a call from a ‘’fake’’ lawyer telling me to please stay away from her cause she was in a new relationship now, to please stop all contact with her cause she and her parents wanted to sue me for following her calling her etc...

I couldn’t believe all this crap and talked to her parents, they told me that was a lie and that they would never do something like this to me cause I was a great Boyfriend …they couldn’t believe what happened.

Guess what it was her ‘’replacement’’ doing this stuff, how crazy can that be?

Its been 2 months now NC... Its been hard, she totally disappeared, no calls no texts nothing from her. So I’ve stayed NC. WOW I was a doormat 150% that su**&^^s. BTW she lives 200ft from my house so I have to deal with that S*&*t.

''Waifs'' are possibly the most dangerous crazy ones oh god! THEY are never alone ALWAYS have a plan to go somewhere or be with friends, dates etc. (Even in a relationship) Having a ''Waif'' BPD GF is out of this world, they are just like a Jellyfish, swimming and hitting you in the most silent and terrible way. She may be with you 5 days in a row being the most awesome girlfriend, but all of a sudden BAM, she has a plan which involves lying manipulating and being indifferent (I guess cheating on you talking bad about you with others)

Next day she will get back to you as the ''lovely'' little carrying sweet girl, being sorry of what she did saying she will change! You take her back... .WATCH OUT, being in this type of relationship will slowly kill you until she paints you black and moves on to the next victim.

And NO they can or will NEVER be alone, they are always looking for a plan, they will NEVER be at home in peace, always going out having a miserable, disgusting crappy life.

[Whiteytheox72]

Amen brother. The waif is a viper. Be thankful you had to contend with odd friends and lesbians, I was replaced by her cousin who was 30 years older than her. NC is the way to be! Stay strong my friend.

[bunnysc]

Thank Whitey, I am being strong! Sorry to here that from you, its HARD keep strong!

[Whiteytheox72]

We can do it.

We have to do it.

We will do it.

Strength begats strength and there is alot here.

[bunnysc]

I agree with you! Some days are harder some days are better! I guess for me the hardest part is understanding how they can move on so fast to a new relationship or just going to bed with a random guy they just met... .All the feelings they talked about all the love is just not TRUE... .Just like a Topic in here... .''Emotional Prost''? JUST INCREDIBLE... .

[Blimblam]

The quiet waif is the the slyest IMO.  There is never anything that stands out that you can point to the problem and they rely much more on the reptilian brain to undermine the defenses. I've known a few borderlines but te quiet waif with no comorbidities hooks the deepest.

I had a waif siren before but the pure quiet waif is litteraly the princess of fairy tales.

[Whiteytheox72]

Amen blimblam amen... .the waif got me hook line and sinker. But when cornered she could become queen witch so quick it was frightening.

[bunnysc]

Wow, so true!^^ I am speechless.

[Mr Hollande]

This famous quote was spoken by one of the biggest weaklings of philosophy. I'm not sure he was right in all cases. I'd say what doesn't kill you makes you wary. At least it should.

[bunnysc]

That's good Mr Hollande!

[thereishope]

We can do it.

We have to do it.

We will do it.

Strength begats strength and there is alot here.

[bunnysc]

What I don't get of my past relationship is why she was always going back to me after I dumped her because of her attitude  + actions? Begging me to be back with her? And I always received her back.

And 1 day she was the one ending the RS for good... Saying I never loved her I never appreciate her, she also said that none of her past Ex B Friends have appreciate her, so she was tired and didn't want anyone in her life LOL... .At the same time she was going to bed with this random guy WOW.

[bunnysc]

^^Any idea?