she wants me back

[1989]

My greatest fear for you is if you do say yes she will then decide to stay with him.  I think she wants to know you're there, and once confirmed she will be overwhelmed with what she now "must" do.  I would insist she get out first, start therapy, and go slow with you.  I would not attempt jumping back in.  She's "drowning" and looking for a life raft.  She's back to idealizing you and the relationship.

I've had my ex do this to me.  It's very painful to see them cling to the "replacement" once they know you want back in.

[EaglesJuju]

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