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Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.
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Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
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Topic: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc. (Read 886 times)
Mike-X
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: living apart
Posts: 669
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #30 on:
April 17, 2015, 04:52:57 PM »
Quote from: DyingLove on April 17, 2015, 04:40:12 PM
Quote from: Mike-X on April 17, 2015, 04:34:54 PM
Quote from: DyingLove on April 17, 2015, 04:22:22 PM
Quote from: Mike-X on April 17, 2015, 03:46:25 PM
What model of Mustang?
It was an '86 with T-top. 5.0 with modifications. Bought it that way, wish I still had it!
Nice! I have an 08 GT. It is currently broken, because I had too much fun with it, but I am moving it up the priority list to get it back on the road. I have also been looking into buying an SN95 or Fox, maybe a convertible to cruise around in, at least until I get the 08 back up.
What do you think of the 2015s?
Haven't really followed vehicles lately, but I love mustangs. Shelbys in particular. Right now I have NOTHING. The BPD ex made sure of that. My brother had a '69 Shelby GT-500. I was about 14 back then but I used to take it out when he went to work. Was cammed blueprinted etx. Was a beast. Now I am happy getting out of bed in the morning. Weird trade-off right?
Mine has been sitting broken since before my divorce and then through the relationship with the udxGF. I had hoped that the GF and I would work on it, but there was so "much" with the relationship that I never had the time to really work on it. I thought that it would be fun to get greasy together.
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fromheeltoheal
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up, I left her
Posts: 5642
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #31 on:
April 17, 2015, 05:41:28 PM »
Quote from: DyingLove on April 15, 2015, 08:22:16 AM
but I'm still scotch taped to her... . or rather... . scotch taped to what I envision we had
I am already, in my own opinion, treading where I should not go.
Throw me a line, I'm drowning again!
OK, let's run with the metaphors: what if you traded in the Scotch tape for Velcro, as you tread water, her attached to your ankle, pulling you down. This is a sink or swim situation and you don't need a line; you can rip that Velcro strap off and swim for shore, although we're in a boat to make sure you make it. Swim hard dude, let's see you show yourself how strong we all know you are. Words be powerful... .
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DyingLove
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 782
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #32 on:
April 17, 2015, 06:00:08 PM »
Quote from: fromheeltoheal on April 17, 2015, 05:41:28 PM
Quote from: DyingLove on April 15, 2015, 08:22:16 AM
but I'm still scotch taped to her... . or rather... . scotch taped to what I envision we had
I am already, in my own opinion, treading where I should not go.
Throw me a line, I'm drowning again!
OK, let's run with the metaphors: what if you traded in the Scotch tape for Velcro, as you tread water, her attached to your ankle, pulling you down. This is a sink or swim situation and you don't need a line; you can rip that Velcro strap off and swim for shore, although we're in a boat to make sure you make it. Swim hard dude, let's see you show yourself how strong we all know you are. Words be powerful... .
Nicely worded fromheeltoheal. Right to tears... .I guess I'm not that strong yet... .but I'm certainly NOT going to go down with the "anchor". This is how I worded it to a friend this morning... .
I can still see the good and bad of the r/s in my mind. I am kinda working on autopilot, because I fight my urges by following my mental itinerary. My mental itinerary is the knowledge that I should be moving forward not dwelling on what I cannot control nor can anything be fixed except for me.
I want to be back in her arms. But that would never work, It's like walking right back into what I left, and I would be devastated. Double edged sword. And her birthday is tomorrow... .I thought it was Sunday but I was wrong. (who cares right?)
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DyingLove
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 782
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #33 on:
April 18, 2015, 07:37:33 AM »
Well it's here! It's her birthday. I'm still alive!
On a serious note, I didn't know whether or not to "recognize" the birthday in my mind, but how could I not? I prayed to God for her last night around midnight and left it in his hands. He knows how I feel and why I do what I do... . I fugured I couldn't get any better than that. I did have wicked dreams of her last night... .I was chasing her down, couldn't get to her quick enuff to tell her that I loved her... .etc. It was a different setting and even though it was her, it was someone else. I remember feeling so broke up in my dream and maybe crying in there too. In fact my eyes really hurt this morning as does everything else. I am just going to MAKE IT THRU TODAY! It's 8:30, and I'm headed to be with my son for at least the morning. I'll keep busy and I'll TRY not to look anywhere that I might see something that might trigger me (FB). Damn... .someone else said it too, I'm really starting to hate FB. I wish all my friends here a peaceful day and nice weather and I'll get on here later and check in. Keep your fingers crossed for me and I'll be praying for you all also.
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Mike-X
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: living apart
Posts: 669
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #34 on:
April 18, 2015, 08:52:57 AM »
Enjoy the time with your son!
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DyingLove
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 782
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #35 on:
April 18, 2015, 11:37:18 AM »
Quote from: Mike-X on April 18, 2015, 08:52:57 AM
Enjoy the time with your son!
Sitting and waiting with him to get a tattoo. I'm kinda like a patient pet, you can bring me just about any where and as long as I have a seat and phone to keep me occupied I'm good.
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Mike-X
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: living apart
Posts: 669
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #36 on:
April 18, 2015, 02:19:18 PM »
Quote from: DyingLove on April 18, 2015, 11:37:18 AM
Quote from: Mike-X on April 18, 2015, 08:52:57 AM
Enjoy the time with your son!
Sitting and waiting with him to get a tattoo. I'm kinda like a patient pet, you can bring me just about any where and as long as I have a seat and phone to keep me occupied I'm good.
Lol. Gotta love smart phones.
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DyingLove
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 782
Re: How to handle Birthdays and Holidays etc.
«
Reply #37 on:
April 18, 2015, 04:03:57 PM »
Quote from: Mike-X on April 18, 2015, 02:19:18 PM
Quote from: DyingLove on April 18, 2015, 11:37:18 AM
Quote from: Mike-X on April 18, 2015, 08:52:57 AM
Enjoy the time with your son!
Sitting and waiting with him to get a tattoo. I'm kinda like a patient pet, you can bring me just about any where and as long as I have a seat and phone to keep me occupied I'm good.
Lol. Gotta love smart phones.
Yes, every one just whips out their phones!
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