Do they try to take your friends with them?

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

My uBPDexgf of 4+ years tried to take one of my friends with her when she cheated on me, replaced me and blamed me for everything.

This friend was my friend first of all, they were friends too but obviously he was closer to me. She tried to turn us against each other in the final weeks of my relationship with her. She had been telling me all these things insinuating that he was trying to come on to her. She had even told me that this friend had told her "I bet you cheat on ta777 all the time huh?". (Projection?)

I brought it up to this friend after the breakup and he said that never happened. He also told me that she had been telling him that I and our other friends hated him because I had told one of our friends that he had checked out his girlfriend at a music festival (he didn't know it was her but it did happen). Thing is that I didn't even tell my friend about that event, and even if I did the friend and I wouldn't hate him for that.

Point is she was telling lies in an attempt to turn us against each other. After the breakup she saw this friend at school and had asked him how I was doing. She had even texted him on a few occassions trying to see how I was doing to which he never responded.

Has anything similar ever happened to you guys? It just seems so evil and planned out. Funny thing is that I ended up having her ex best friend who she had painted black a few months prior to our breakup tell me about all her wrongdoings in the relationship including the cheating. I still talk to her ex bestfriend to this day.

[ta777]

My uBPDexgf of 4+ years tried to take one of my friends with her when she cheated on me, replaced me and blamed me for everything.

This friend was my friend first of all, they were friends too but obviously he was closer to me. She tried to turn us against each other in the final weeks of my relationship with her. She had been telling me all these things insinuating that he was trying to come on to her. She had even told me that this friend had told her "I bet you cheat on ta777 all the time huh?". (Projection?)

I brought it up to this friend after the breakup and he said that never happened. He also told me that she had been telling him that I and our other friends hated him because I had told one of our friends that he had checked out his girlfriend at a music festival (he didn't know it was her but it did happen). Thing is that I didn't even tell my friend about that event, and even if I did the friend and I wouldn't hate him for that.

Point is she was telling lies in an attempt to turn us against each other. After the breakup she saw this friend at school and had asked him how I was doing. She had even texted him on a few occassions trying to see how I was doing to which he never responded.

Has anything similar ever happened to you guys? It just seems so evil and planned out. Funny thing is that I ended up having her ex best friend who she had painted black a few months prior to our breakup tell me about all her wrongdoings in the relationship including the cheating. I still talk to her ex bestfriend to this day.

[CloseToFreedom]

Yeah sure, she tried to bond with my friends after we were done. She had no friends left so all she had were my friends, 'mutual' friends.

it worked on some, not on others. Plus she dropped most of them when she found my replacement anyway.

[JRT]

Mine did the opposite: she unfriended all of my friends on FB (much to their chagrin and offense) and then convinced her family and friends to do the same.

[Mutt]

Mine did the opposite: she unfriended all of my friends on FB (much to their chagrin and offense) and then convinced her family and friends to do the same.

Same here. I logged on and over a few days I noticed all of her family and friends unfriended me on FB without a word.

Some of my family members commented that they were surprised that she didn't say goodbye and simply unfriended. I was split black.

That being said ta777 I get the impression there's a lot of drama with her and your friends. You know your situation best and I do get the impression she's seeking attention. Negative attention is still attention.

[clydegriffith]

While i was with her all my friends became her friends as she didn't really have any. After the fact not so much as her modus operendi is that once she's figured out and the inevitible happens is to pick up and start off fresh with a new victim that has no idea about her past.

[Trog]

Luckily all my friends disliked her and I disliked all her friends. No friends were harmed in the making of our story. Had any of my friends or family liked her for sure she'd try to triangulate them, she did it when I first met her, this is why I kept all my friends away from her. I was able to make that connection and take evasive action but not able to just leave the relationship. It's incredible the things we'll tell ourselves to stay in these relationships its clearly screaming dysfunctional from the page!

[joc1970]

My uBPDx tried to sleep with all my friends.