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Skills we were never taught
98
A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
Don't Be Invalidating
Listen with Empathy -
A Powerful Life Skill
Setting Boundaries
and Setting Limits
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Author Topic: When she realized that she had BPD, she stopped therapy  (Read 434 times)
josephbinu
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 1


« on: June 09, 2015, 12:06:30 AM »

Dear team.

Wife wife having BPD and we had gone for therapy for a month. But when she realized that she is having BPD she stops the therapy. We have 2 years old baby girl. At present my wife needs divorce. But I am not ready to give the same. I need to back her to life. At present she lives with her mother and baby. She not allow to see my baby and her. Her mother suffering BPD also. At present they are not allowing anyone to interfere their life including her brother. So what should I do? I need her back... .We are separating last 3 months.

Regards

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RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

Invictus01
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« Reply #1 on: June 09, 2015, 12:15:07 AM »

You might want to post it on the staying or undecided boards. But if you know she got BPD and she stopped therapy once she realized she has BPD... .why would you stay? She NEEDS therapy (and a whole lot of it, years) to be a real partner in your relationship. Without it, there is no hope.
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Turkish
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12179


Dad to my wolf pack


« Reply #2 on: June 09, 2015, 10:42:44 PM »

Hello,

Though you're seperated, it's clear you desire to keep your family intact. My short response is to read the lessons to the right of the board to understand what BPD is, and how to better deal with her. I'm sorry that she's taken your baby after abandoning therapy. Shame is a powerful, unhealthy emotion at the core of a person with BPD (pwBPD). We often trigger that shame unknowingly.

What are the legal issues where you are? Where I am in the USA, both parents have equal legal custody rights to our children, though that does not stop parents from doing what she has done. However, you do have rights as a father. Have you sought legal counsel?

I hope to hear more how we can help.

Turkish
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
married21years
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 609



« Reply #3 on: June 10, 2015, 01:32:08 AM »

stay calm read a lot. once communication opens up and it will you can sort things maybe.  just remember to stay calm... .

good luck   
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