Can you have a waif/hermit/queen uBPDm?

[pookielocks]

my mom exhibits all 3 of these in full force. is it possible that she isn't just one type? i'm new here by the way.

[Panda39]

Hi Pookielocks,

Welcome to the Family  I'm glad you've found us.

Yep, your mom could conceivably be all the various types listed in Christine Lawson's book.  I would describe my SO's uBPDxw as the same combination.  She is primarily Queen... .everyone must do it her way or you will suffer, if being the Queen doesn't get her what she wants then she switches to waif... .Oh poor poor pitiful her and if the Queen or Waif don't get her what she wants she can withdraw and go hermit.

Do you think your mom has a primary type?  Are there different times or situations where you might see one or more of these types?

Again welcome 

Panda39

[pookielocks]

thank you for responding. i don't think she has a primary type. she uses different ones to get different things.

[Rock Chick]

My bf's mother is one too that can be waif, queen and all types described in Christine Lawson's book. So yes I think its possible and agree with other ppl who have commented.

[maddnessreturns]

My mom can be all of those in that book. It's like I never know what I'm going to get it changes so often. It was terrifying as a kid growing up because I never knew what I was going to get. While one day X was good the next day it wouldn't be.

[busybee1116]

 

Mine flips between waif and queen. It's an interesting coin flip to see her go from completely helpless/dependent to raging full fierce omnipotent. And unpredictable. Hermit occasionally, she likes to hoard and be left alone with her stuff, unbothered, but I think she gets lonely after awhile even though things are easier for her than people.

[unicorn2014]

  and welcome

I've seen all 4 traits in my mom, so I'm quite sure its possible .

Have you read the book Understanding The Borderline Mother?