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VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?" Parental alienation is when a parent allows a child to participate or hear them degrade the other parent. This is not uncommon in divorces and the children often adjust. In severe cases, however, it can be devastating to the child. This video provides a helpful overview.
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Author Topic: It's better for him to be out our sons life  (Read 389 times)
Dontknow88
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« on: December 26, 2016, 12:41:40 PM »

Our son is 10.5 months old and I dread the day when my baby will ask me "how come he doesn't feel his promises?" , "why dose he yell/hit me for no reason(not that I promote hitting)".

My ex has a problem with consistency. He would rather come when he's a emotional mess then to have the common sense to just stay home and come when you feel better.

I'm giving the light story. Have you ever wished they just stay out of the child's life and stop confusing them, abusing them.

I can tell he's trying but I'm tied of the roller coaster and exposing our child to it. I think he will do less harm being away.

Do you feel the same? Or not?
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Kwamina
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« Reply #1 on: January 05, 2017, 02:54:16 PM »

Hi again Dontknow88,

My ex has a problem with consistency. He would rather come when he's a emotional mess then to have the common sense to just stay home and come when you feel better.
... .
I can tell he's trying but I'm tied of the roller coaster and exposing our child to it. I think he will do less harm being away.

That your ex seems to be trying is a good thing, yet when it comes to the safety of your child I would say that probably a bit more is needed then just trying. Do you believe your ex has any true understanding of his issues? Do you feel like he genuinely acknowledges his issues and is committed to getting help to get better?

Take care
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Mutt
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« Reply #2 on: January 05, 2017, 09:04:22 PM »

Hi Dontknow88,

I'd feel protective and worried about if it was my baby too. that being said, how much does he help with the baby?
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Dontknow88
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« Reply #3 on: January 06, 2017, 10:21:00 AM »

Hi again Dontknow88,

That your ex seems to be trying is a good thing, yet when it comes to the safety of your child I would say that probably a bit more is needed then just trying. Do you believe your ex has any true understanding of his issues? Do you feel like he genuinely acknowledges his issues and is committed to getting help to get better?

Take care

He knows he has issues after the storm if that makes sense. He reacts and sometime later you will realize what he has done. He knows the diagnosis of his issues and has told me that he is OK with being messed up for the rest of his life and because he has a child he will do the minimum to get better and not the maximum because "there is no hope"   Thank you so much for agreeing with me he tries but it's not enough it's not enough for me to trust him with our son completely alone even when he's trying and things seem good he will break out into tears and storm out. If I son cries he hands them straight to me and hides in my bathroom and cry. I can't have my son growing up seeing the instability. I feel horrible but that something for my son to learn  off it's not a positive thing
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Dontknow88
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« Reply #4 on: January 06, 2017, 10:22:07 AM »

Hi Dontknow88,

I'd feel protective and worried about if it was my baby too. that being said, how much does he help with the baby?

Only financially. We live in different countries and he only seen him on three different occasions for less than an hour our son is almost a year old.
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