I finally said I had to get back to work. Ooh, I also said that I would not tolerate her talking to me like that. I felt so brave!
Rock on, Ladybug123! Good for you for insisting on a healthy boundary. I did that once, years ago, and it felt like it was ripping me to shreds. But, in the end, it communicated that I was not willing to be stomped on. She still does occasionally, but she now knows that there are consequences to her behavior.
BTW - I'm scared of my mother too. And a big empath. I think it comes with the merging that BPD moms encourage. I got to know and anticipate my mother's feelings better than my own.
And another BTW: Drama queen was one of my mom's favorite names for me also. I now realize that almost every single name she called me (drama queen, self-centered, insensitive, etc.) apply much more to her than to me. Perhaps it's the same with your mom? It does sound like she has a love for drama... .