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Skills we were never taught
98
A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
Don't Be Invalidating
Listen with Empathy -
A Powerful Life Skill
Setting Boundaries
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Author Topic: My fiancee with BPD is trying to attach but wont speak to me  (Read 577 times)
LostDreamer93

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Engaged
Posts: 4


« on: January 06, 2025, 02:49:37 PM »

I recently started getting close to my fiancees mother at her request to grow closer to her family. She was surprised at how well it went and didn't expect her mother to like me. 4 days ago she demanded that her mother show her our conversations. Her mother refused stating adults are allowed private conversations. She then came to me and demanded my entire messenger account to read for herself. I offered to screenshot anything she wanted to know. But I'm not comfortable handing over my account. Especially not as a demand. This triggered her and she started splitting. Saying she hates me when just the day before was talking about how grateful she was that I'm in her life and how much she loves me. She hasn't spoken to me in these last 4 days. But her family has told me she listens to my voice messages daily. She's sleeping with the plushies I bought her. And she keeps talking to them about me in a positive light. But she still won't speak to me. What can I do?
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kells76
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Posts: 4033



« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2025, 04:34:22 PM »

Hi LostDreamer93;

That's gotta hurt, to try to put in effort for your fiancee's sake (by connecting her mom), and then to have that turn into another conflict.

Was I reading your post correctly, that your fiancee is either living at her family's home, or is/was staying there?

Has she reached out to you at all in the last couple of weeks?
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