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BPDFamily.com
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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
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Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
Had a cry today
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Topic: Had a cry today (Read 469 times)
bus boy
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 908
Had a cry today
«
on:
April 16, 2017, 06:50:34 PM »
This evening I was working around the house and listening to music, I looked up bruised orange, a John Prine song I haven't heard for a while. two verses that hit me were "a heart stained with anger grows weak and grows bitter, you become your own prisoner as you watch yourself sit there" that made me think about the bitterness I still have for Xw. I work hard on detachment, growing and moving forward but I must admit I have some bitter feelings towards Xw for what she did. The second verse that broke me down was " sat on the park bench kissed the girl with the black hair". That made me weep like a baby. As much I thought I was detached from Xw I realized how much I loved her. I must admit I struggle with Xw living with another man, holding him in her arms at night, dropping s10 off at home and seeing her BF's car in her driveway, it cements in me every time I drop s10 off that my replacement is the man in her life, the man who makes Xw happy where I failed. This is there second year, second Xmas, New Years, thanksgiving, Easter, by our second year the r/s was a disaster, when we told my family we were getting married they couldn't hide the shock, the look in my moms eyes was very clear to see. My mom knew how abusive the r/s was concerned for me. Through it all I still have pain deep down inside, I still feel like I failed deep down inside. I will still keep pushing forward but maybe a piece of us is gone forever and maybe Xw will always have a piece of my heart.
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insideoutside
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Friend
Posts: 330
Re: Had a cry today
«
Reply #1 on:
April 16, 2017, 07:31:56 PM »
Sorry to hear that busboy; it's nearly 1.30 am here in the UK and I'm listening to music that is seriously triggering me too. Music can be so emotive at times. I know I'm in love with my friend but I'm married and trying so hard to detach and listening to music that takes me back to a beautiful place isn't helping with that process.
Hugs x
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bus boy
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 908
Re: Had a cry today
«
Reply #2 on:
April 16, 2017, 08:42:35 PM »
HI izzybusy, sorry to hear you are struggling today. Music can certainly get the emotions stirring. I got caught in the moment and kept up with playing music that was emotionally moving.
Have a good night
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Herodias
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1787
Re: Had a cry today
«
Reply #3 on:
April 16, 2017, 09:30:57 PM »
Music makes me cry all the time in the car when I'm driving. I have to keep tissue on hand. I've felt the same way- two years out as well. Had all the same thoughts about "them". I refuse to believe I failed and you shouldn't either. The new person will go through the same thing. I'm just sorry that you still have to see her. I think if we had people in our lives we would feel better too. It's just so hard to find. They grab any person and make it work temporarily. Just remember it's a holiday and it's usually not enjoyable with them. We are better off alone. I spent the whole day alone and I was perfectly fine. You'll be fine too.
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Turkish
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2013; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12127
Dad to my wolf pack
Re: Had a cry today
«
Reply #4 on:
April 17, 2017, 12:15:23 AM »
The relationship may be gone, but the piece of it remaining, most significant and precious, is your son. Continue to fight for him.
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