Hi Qman,
I would not necessarily think that a breakup means someone doesn't love me. My h broke with me many times (hundreds) and I see it now as I was getting tossed overboard because his stress levels/emotions were high and that is what he does when his stress levels/emotions are high. I know how extremely confusing and painful it can be though! Our logical brains really struggle with it - I know I have!
Have you had a chance to look at any of the tools on the site yet? Working on your communication skills can go a long way to at least not making things worse, and might even improve things. At the least, by engaging the community here you can become more clear as you work your way to a point of understanding the intricacies of BPD and BPD traits.
Have you seen this on the
Dos and Don'ts of BPD relationships?
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?board=36.0 It might be a good place to start! If you take a look let us know what you think of it! Keep posting and let us know how things are going and what insights you are discovering.