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BPDFamily.com
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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
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Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
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Guilt and shame with anger
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Topic: Guilt and shame with anger (Read 418 times)
Qman
Formerly Q7
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 14
Guilt and shame with anger
«
on:
November 30, 2017, 04:07:01 AM »
My BPDgf is keeping a daily emotion diary. We’ve just had a couple of rough days (starting with her angry and verbally abusing, and then not talking to me for 2 days). Interestingly, on her emotion diary she’s marked 5/5 for anger (that was obvious). But she has also marked 4s and 5s for shame and guilt, which surprised me, but I think helps me understand.
I read somewhere that pwBPD can have a series of triggered emotions, one triggered by the next. So, for example, the initial “incident” might trigger anger but then the person may feel guilt or shame at their response or actions when they’re angry, which may then trigger more (misplaced) anger at the other person for making them angry or putting them in that position, etc.
Does anyone else have experience with this?
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Re: Guilt and shame with anger
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Reply #1 on:
November 30, 2017, 04:17:28 AM »
Great presentation on the Emotional Cascade Model especially the flow diagrams near the end and ones with the waterfall background... .the dysregulation from negative emotions is self feeding from the shame of the maladapted response to the initial dysregulation. I'm pretty sure there's a youtube of the actual presentation somewhere.
www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/EMOTIONAL-CASCADES.pdf
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Enabler
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Living apart
Posts: 2790
Re: Guilt and shame with anger
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Reply #2 on:
November 30, 2017, 04:19:03 AM »
Here it is
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saT6KxbkDEY
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