Aw thanks Mutt and SunandMoon,
I'm very glad the people at her home recognized she needed help and got her to the hospital without having to "Baker Act" her. She's a woman of color who, unfortunately, is scared of cops, so she freaks out at police.
I believe she's in charge of taking her own meds, and I think she has to attend a mandatory amount of group therapy sessions. I also know she sees at least one psychiatrist, possibly two (she's trying to get Adderall out of them and having no luck .)
I don't know what to suggest. Give her more time? Keep your boundaries? Date others? What do you want to do?
I think for now, it's best she stay where she is and I keep strong boundaries. I mean, she wasn't doing any better living with me. Either way she ends up in the psyche ward every few months. At least now I'm not subjected to her episodes.
COULD I commit to taking on a mentally ill partner? I wonder. I don't have children or serious health issues of my own. I don't have siblings, so at some point I will probably be caretaker for one or both parents. I'm able to keep a roof over my head and food in my stomach, but I don't have much disposable income. The measly money her disability brings in wouldn't help much towards building a life for two.
So I can focus on making a better life for myself, and possibly for her if she ever shapes up, or I can waste all my energy dealing with her drama. Maybe someday when I've got less hours to work, more financial security, etc., maybe that's a time I can reassess.
I never wanted to maintain a long-distance relationship, and I'm not sure how to stop engaging in it. I do NOT want to videochat every day, text all the time, or invest lots of energy in someone I can only see every couple of months. I was thinking about telling her that I promise to call her once a week at a certain time, and that's it, because the constant attempts to engage my attention are driving me bonkers.
We always had an open relationship, so I date. Sadly, no one is as attractive to me as her. I'm feeling quite shut down sexually towards anyone who isn't her. Hoping time, or the right person, will fix that.