Having a mother with BPD is incredibly difficult. When we were children it is like we were on a never ending rollercoaster (sometimes we don't even realize it). Our parents are the ones who show us what "normal" is. My mother would constantly give the silent treatment, lectures in front of the entire family, and triangulate between me and my sister. I just thought that was normal, but it isn't. Now my relationship has become much more abusive (so hard to actually say that). And I mean emotionally, no physical abuse here. My mother has rallied my entire family against me. My dad and I used to be so close and now it feels like he is my worst enemy. It is so sad to think about the way life used to be before I "rocked the boat" and moved out (what a huge abandonment for my mother to face). We just have to use the supports we have and set boundaries. Good luck with everything and keep posting!
Wow, you are writing my current issue. My family has me living to help financially support my mother (me, my husband, and my 2 little ones 4 and 3). I am afraid of the family, and my mother when I decide to leave because it means she has to sell her house (which my father who died 5 years ago bought when they "made it". I just am getting to the point that I am tired of the abuse, and I am tired of my children see her abuse me. The energy it takes to get through a day is so big. It's nice to see that someone has made it out despite the enmeshment. I've always been the scapegoat, but I am tired of it!
