Been able to take interest in other women

[RandallUk30]

If I find myself thinking of her I usually read these threads on here or on GettingBetter website. It reminds that a normal person that loves and values you doesn’t just say they want to commit their life to you but actually do it and not just tell you a load of crap and drop you and move on to the next victim.

I’m now at a stage where I can really breath a sigh of relief that I don’t have that mentally abusive crap any more. I’ve even been able to take interest in other woman and start some playful banter and flirting with them and not feel I miss my ex. When she randomly texts looking for some sympathy I can read her texts without thinking “Wow she might want to get back me with” and now I can reply and be generic.

This post was split from Origin Topic, so that this discussion can continue it it's own right.

[Jeffree]

Don't take the bait - For a very long time I used to believe that all the good things my STBx would promise me could happen, if only I behaved a certain way, did a certain thing, or really understood how to treat her, would really happen. When they kept not happening despite my best efforts, and in many cases not only didn't happen but even had a worse outcome than I could have ever imagined, I would try and figure out how to get back on a good track.

Once I realized she was just out and out lying to me and that these things she promised were never going to happen, I stopped taking the bait and instead would watch her try and set me up, only now I was not in the game of trying to make amends or appeal to her reasonable side anymore.

Once I saw behind the curtain the jig was up and I was done and stayed done.

J

[Lucky Jim]

Once I saw behind the curtain the jig was up and I was done and stayed done.

Took me a long time to get to the point of declining the "bait"!  Like you, Jeffree, I believed that things could get back on a good track, which proved to be a mirage.

LJ