Has she ever moved out before? Do you think these thoughts are due to her feeling trapped? Depressed? Grieving over the baby?
Thank you for responding Tattered. I am a man of few words and don't really want to write a "book" if I don't have to. There is so much more details than my original post that effect our circumstances. Blended Family, High Anxiety xwife, 2 bio kids on my side, her thyroid condition, cultural differences, language differences, bad childhood for her (sexual abuse multiple times, no father figure, depression, eating disorders). It is a mess... .
Has she moved out before? She has left a few times for a couple months at a time.
Do you think these thoughts are due to her feeling trapped? Yes, she feels trapped with my situation with my kids and my responsibilities to them. In a perfect world, it would just be me and her and everything would be a fairy tale. Instead, she tries to control (limit) my time with the kids and thinks that any interaction I have with the kids is a slap to her face and she feels I am not putting her 1st place.
Depressed? Grieving over the baby? Yes and Yes. I has almost been a year since we lost the baby and anything can trigger bad and depressing thoughts. But she turns those thoughts to anger against me and against my kids that is extremely hard to hear.
On the flip side, my kids (10 and 12)(especially my son) verbalizes their unhappiness toward her for the way she treats them. I try to be patient with them too and let them get their frustrations out.
It has been extremely hard to keep the peace these 5 years if you can imagine.
So yes, there is a mountain of details that I could go in, but for the sake of brevity and time, I have not.