She just reached out

[Jimievs]

So after seeing her Friday to take some bits for her, then worrying about how she was ... Details in another post, I haven't heard from her and decided to really try and feel what I'm feeling, have a look at things in my mind, and I thought maybe I need to let her go completely this time

Problem.now is Ive just received a message saying hope I'm ok, I really don't know how to respond to something so simple, as I guess I just want be with her

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Doughboy]

As I see it there are two choices here. Both work if you really want to let go but only one works if you want to be with her and are confused by her simple message.

Option 1 letting her go OR being with her:
Just reply, "Thank you". Basic, non confrontational.

Option 2 letting her go only:
Do not reply in any way.  If you want to let her go then start here.

[Jimievs]

So I replied in thank you ... Not heard anything since ... Really feeling it today though, currently at work and all I wanna do is see her, hold her, but I have no say in it, just wanna go home and turn off

[Jimievs]

So it turns out I'm the reason for her drinking and all her problems, accused of being controlling again , been told that because I help her I'm always there for her , talk to her when she struggling pick her up when she's got lost, that it's me treating her as weak, if I ask her if she's spoke to anyone that it makes me suspicious ( she doesn't work and doesn't do a great deal, so it's just away of conversation to take interest in her day), so she says she stopped talking to her mum and friends, accuses me of only playing a game on her phone with her so I can check up on her, says she stopped going out because of me and she couldn't tell me because we'd argue and I wouldn't let her leave... Well she's right about argueing because if I'd of known this is what she felt I would I would argue ... It's completely unfair and untrue ... I trusted her to tell me the truth when we were together always asked her to tell me how she was feeling so things like this could be worked and understood but it seems that never happened, now she with her parents with them looking after her and she says she feels strong again, I'm really confused and always thinking wow she's making me out to be a monster, I'm actually in shock hearing all this ... Help

[Jimievs]

So Ive told her t not to contact me again, I'm completely going no contact and removing myself from it ... I can take accountability for actions, but what she is saying I just so obscured that I can't be entertaining it, she can spread these accusations of she chooses but I'm not gonna allow them to beat me down... The contradictions, I'm finally taking control